(no subject)

[linnai.livejournal.com]

I was just curious to know if any of the systems here feel the need to have someone be the more or less full time "front-runner". Maybe not necessarily a host or original or anything like that... but just someone stable who generally has the reins?

I know quite a few of the systems and households on the list don't really work in that way, so I suppose this is more geared for the systems that do, or people who might have an informative opinion on the subject.

Really, the reason I ask is we seem to operate on this very unstable sort of sliding scale. There are times when it seems like we're all locked out of actually FRONTING... we can do things, but it's like sharing with everyone else and no one has true control, and then there are other times when it feels like everyone EXCEPT FOR [fill in the blank] is having the problem. It's usually not the same person though.

Sometimes this feeling lasts a long time, long enough that whoever is up front starts to wonder and question the validity of our seperation as opposed to an actual mental illness or disorder that isn't a part of the dissociative spectrum (such as schizophrenia).

Other times, we're SO seperate and have such a hard time coordinating ourselves that it really feels like we're disordered.

Anyone understand what I'm getting to? Thanks. Tonight's just very stressful (which seems to be something of a precipitator of these kinds of thoughts/situations)...

Inspired by comments.

[laurenthemself]

I was reading the comments on this entry about communication within systems, and I had a thought... just a vague one at this stage, but hey, I'll settle for vague, since I rarely have very solid thoughts.

I was thinking, because of the way multiplicity tends to be presented in the media (as a Bad Thing), and how integration is seen as the only way to 'cure' this 'disorder', and also that it's 'always' caused by abuse, what if people here wrote their own stories? I know some people wouldn't be able to manage a whole novel, but even short stories would be good, and maybe (it's a very long shot, I know) we could try and get our work published.

Even if you think this idea's crap, would you ever try writing the story of yourselves?

Looking For Advice on Non-Conventional Relationships

[zenboiuke.livejournal.com]

Hello! *waves to the people who know us from our f-list* lol

I am the primary fronter of my system. There are others who are around most of the time, but I am the one who is almost always in control. As such I have almost exclusive 3D experience, but almost no ability to back away from the front.

C is my lover, and a member of another system. We thought at first he was perhaps a soulbond but he seems to be a walk-in or spirit. He is not the primary, and as such rarely fronts, and spends most of his time in the inner world as do the other non-primaries in that system.

We--myself, he and his system's primary, who is a very good friend of mine--are sort of feeling things out as we go, as this is a new situation for us. My friend & I have a completely platonic relationship (especially seeing as how I am gay & she is a she :p) but she has said she is comfortable with the relationship between C & I as long as she doesn't fade into the background and lose primary status, which is certainly understandable. She & her inner family are still exploring various possibilities for who & what the others might be, how many there are, etc, and I don't wish to cause her to feel any sense of unease or anxiety at what must already be a confusing time for her.

Currently, the only means of communication between C & myself is via text messaging, email & LJ for a few hours each week (my friend lives several hundred miles away, so no easy physical contact 6_6;;). I am trying to broaden my ability to travel beyond the 3D world, and starting to explore Dreamwalking & Astral travel so that I can spend more time with C on equal ground. Meeting in our soul forms would take care of most of the challenges we currently face (him not having a body, mine being FUBAR 6 ways till Sunday 9_9;;;, cost of plane fare, etc lol), so any information or tips on how to travel beyond the body would be most appreciated, as I have heard conflicting advice from several sources lol (Incidentally, we share several similar memories, and I believe we were likely lovers in a past life, so we have chosen a place we both remember)

I am mainly looking for any advice or information if anyone else in this community is in or has been in or has known anyone in a similar relationship. It is, needless to say, rather unconventional ;p But I have always believed that if someone wants something badly enough they will find a way to get it. Though it is frustrating being unable to spend time together freely as 'normal' people might, and share many of the simple pleasures (The fates are conspiring so that I will NEVER get any help cleaning that damn cat litter! [/mock-ANGST!] :p) I wouldn't trade C for any 3D man I know, even if they offered to pay off all my debt and give me a brand new body that works the way it's supposed to (That should give the few of you on this list who are also on my friends list--and therefore know my personal financial & physical struggles--an indication of how important C is to me ^_~)

So, after pondering these issues for a few weeks, it occurred to me that we can't possibly be the only lovers who are challenged by such circumstances. It would be great to know what has worked for others, or even join a community for such couples (or triplets or, you know, whatever works for you ;) just to have the support of others who understand the peculiar difficulties we face.

For those of you who have the ability to see & touch your lovers, whether you both be in-house or 3D, please do so. Hold them & kiss them and never take that gift for granted ^_^

~Kier

3....2.....1.....Blast off!

[jhonathand.livejournal.com]

Announcing the launch of glbtqs_multi. It's up and running, I'm about to make the first post,.

all are welcome to join. you just have to E-Mail me first and tell me a bit about yourself/selves and please bear with me, I have a hard enough time remembering names and Lj usernames on a normal basis. Throw in 'Others' and I'm amazed that I can remember anybody at all.

Other than that,

The floor of the community is yours, please use it as you see fit. (within reason that is.)

All the Info about the community is in the bio. along with some basic rules.

Nothing too heavy, just some common sense things.

I'm also aiming for this to be a light-hearted forum,. I realize that not all the topics will be of course. But I remain optimistic.

also I thought about changing the name to- glbtqs_multiple, But I think it might be too late for that,.

In any case here it is,

Thanx,

~M~

symptoms anyone?

[idianshire.livejournal.com]

I have been wondering since a previous post what the symptoms of multiplicity (not the disordered view) actually are. I mean I know what you read on other websites, but they seem more to do with post traumatic stress than multiplicity, or someone that thinks Sybil is the only multiple known in the last 50 years. Now I don’t mean what makes someone multiple, we are fine with our definition of that, the debate here is what would be on a checklist. I hate the word symptom because it does imply illness, maybe characteristics would be a better word. Things like time loss.. which I know a lot of multiples don’t actually have, I suppose we do lose time, although as Tryall said it isn’t so much that we lose time as much as someone’s life/activities/ are so boring no one else pays any attention. We lose time by a conscious choice. We hear voices but in a study we took part in the woman running it said that hearing voices is something a large part of the population does anyway. Maybe there aren’t any clear cut symptoms/characteristics that are relevant to multiples/plurals as a group, and maybe we are all just so bored that the most exciting thing for us to do is argue amongst ourselves on this foggy day… which is more likely