Finally: A place where I belong =)
Jun. 21st, 2007 11:17 am![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
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multiplicity_archivesHey there,
Before I introduce myself, let me just start off by saying I literally had NO hope left for anything before I found this community last night. Reading through everybody's posts and such...god, I almost cried at how relieved I felt. I've read so many "MPD/DID" text books and been to a therapist and blah blah blah...and with the text books I became even more confused, because I didn't seem to fit the "text book" model of being a multiple. I was never abused, me and "my guys" are all conscious of each other, etc. So I thought, "Well, what the hell? Am I lying to myself? Why aren't I like those other multiples?" and my therapist sure didn't help any. SO...yes. This community is probably the greatest thing I've ever stumbled upon. It may have just saved my life. Now, I beleive I owe you all an introduction =)
I guess I'll start with myself:
My name is Laura and I'm 17 (18 in July!!) I have absolutely no idea which personality traits I possess. I guess I know "my guys" better than I know myself. I guess I'd be considered the "Host"...but I don't think that fits my position very well.
My guys:
-Lance: Alright...Lance is a little different. He's actually Lance Bass. From Nsync. Lance came to me when I was in 5th grade (Since I was 10). He's always with me "up front". Always. It's always half him, half me. We stand side by side. And he kind of just lives his own life. He lives in Los Angeles, California, and has his own friends, seperate from my own. He doesn't know about the rest of of my guys, and I don't think he knows about me. He looks like the actualy Lance Bass, and he's interested in most of the things he is. He just turned 28 on May 4th, and what do you know! So did the actual Lance Bass. And oh yeah, he's gay =) He was the first one here...or well, the first one to make himself known, and he's always been my partner in crime, even if he doesn't know it =)
-Noah James: Noah...hmmm, he's a handful, that's for sure. He's 19 and shares my birthday. Although once he turns 20 (In July), I'm thinking he's probably just going to stay 20. He's usually very...angry. He lashes out at my friends on the internet a lot, because he's scared of people getting close to us. He's convinced that no one cares about us, and that everyone lies to us about everything. He's been here for about 2 1/2 years, I suppose. He doesn't talk (Just types on the computer). He rarely makes any facial expressions. He likes to make people uncomfortable when he stares at them. He'll get right up in people's faces and just...stare. He's also gay. He dyes his hair funny colors (My hair has been every color of the rainbow thanks to him). He has a penpal from Russia (We're all learning Russian together), and him and her have been talking for about a year and a half now. Suprisingly, he absolutely ADORES her. I left him in charge of talking to her. He was the second one here, and he's up front pretty regularly with me and Lance.
-London: London is very sweet. Very sweet. He just likes to see everyone happy and getting along. He talks in a very sweet voice and he's very gentle. He's very lean and pale. And...he has no sexual orientation that I know of. Isn't interested in boys and isn't interested in girls. But yeah, he's kind of the "father" figure. Tries to smooth things over when they go wrong.
Joel: Ah, the newest member =) I don't know too much about him right now. Real friendly, I know that. But he's only made himself know...well, maybe a little more than a week ago. I know he has dark brown hair, bright blue eyes, and he's very pale. He enjoys painting, which he proved last night. I think he's going to be fun to have around and I can't wait to see his personality progress over time =)
Sooo...that's them. I could write pages and pages of information (except for Joel), about all of them, but I figured this is long enough as it is =D
Me and my guys look forward to talking with you all and getting to know more about you! As my title says...Finally: A place where I belong.
No longer alone,
-Us
Before I introduce myself, let me just start off by saying I literally had NO hope left for anything before I found this community last night. Reading through everybody's posts and such...god, I almost cried at how relieved I felt. I've read so many "MPD/DID" text books and been to a therapist and blah blah blah...and with the text books I became even more confused, because I didn't seem to fit the "text book" model of being a multiple. I was never abused, me and "my guys" are all conscious of each other, etc. So I thought, "Well, what the hell? Am I lying to myself? Why aren't I like those other multiples?" and my therapist sure didn't help any. SO...yes. This community is probably the greatest thing I've ever stumbled upon. It may have just saved my life. Now, I beleive I owe you all an introduction =)
I guess I'll start with myself:
My name is Laura and I'm 17 (18 in July!!) I have absolutely no idea which personality traits I possess. I guess I know "my guys" better than I know myself. I guess I'd be considered the "Host"...but I don't think that fits my position very well.
My guys:
-Lance: Alright...Lance is a little different. He's actually Lance Bass. From Nsync. Lance came to me when I was in 5th grade (Since I was 10). He's always with me "up front". Always. It's always half him, half me. We stand side by side. And he kind of just lives his own life. He lives in Los Angeles, California, and has his own friends, seperate from my own. He doesn't know about the rest of of my guys, and I don't think he knows about me. He looks like the actualy Lance Bass, and he's interested in most of the things he is. He just turned 28 on May 4th, and what do you know! So did the actual Lance Bass. And oh yeah, he's gay =) He was the first one here...or well, the first one to make himself known, and he's always been my partner in crime, even if he doesn't know it =)
-Noah James: Noah...hmmm, he's a handful, that's for sure. He's 19 and shares my birthday. Although once he turns 20 (In July), I'm thinking he's probably just going to stay 20. He's usually very...angry. He lashes out at my friends on the internet a lot, because he's scared of people getting close to us. He's convinced that no one cares about us, and that everyone lies to us about everything. He's been here for about 2 1/2 years, I suppose. He doesn't talk (Just types on the computer). He rarely makes any facial expressions. He likes to make people uncomfortable when he stares at them. He'll get right up in people's faces and just...stare. He's also gay. He dyes his hair funny colors (My hair has been every color of the rainbow thanks to him). He has a penpal from Russia (We're all learning Russian together), and him and her have been talking for about a year and a half now. Suprisingly, he absolutely ADORES her. I left him in charge of talking to her. He was the second one here, and he's up front pretty regularly with me and Lance.
-London: London is very sweet. Very sweet. He just likes to see everyone happy and getting along. He talks in a very sweet voice and he's very gentle. He's very lean and pale. And...he has no sexual orientation that I know of. Isn't interested in boys and isn't interested in girls. But yeah, he's kind of the "father" figure. Tries to smooth things over when they go wrong.
Joel: Ah, the newest member =) I don't know too much about him right now. Real friendly, I know that. But he's only made himself know...well, maybe a little more than a week ago. I know he has dark brown hair, bright blue eyes, and he's very pale. He enjoys painting, which he proved last night. I think he's going to be fun to have around and I can't wait to see his personality progress over time =)
Sooo...that's them. I could write pages and pages of information (except for Joel), about all of them, but I figured this is long enough as it is =D
Me and my guys look forward to talking with you all and getting to know more about you! As my title says...Finally: A place where I belong.
No longer alone,
-Us
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Date: 2007-06-22 06:21 am (UTC)Being multiple, as you have said, isn't exactly the most accepted thing in the world. But the perception of what is 'possible' (accepted) for multiples has changed a lot even for professionals. There was a time when it was thought to be impossible (and thus "going too far", etc.) to have more than two people per group. Before Sybil, selves who were an opposite gender to the body were supposedly unheard of. After Sybil, it was accepted as a standard, and the 'average' number of people went from five or so, to fourteen because that was how many people were in Sybil's Family.
I think we're dealing with a set of experiences that are maybe not all related to each other, and people are having to self-define a lot of things because there's very little cultural permission for any of this outside of the Sybil or classic model. It's natural that some people would get defensive over things -- I think everybody does at some point and I think that's where a lot of "point and laugh at the crayzees" comes from.