Connundrums?

[linnai.livejournal.com]

Started out seperate but neither cooperative nor co-conscious in any way.

ONE person and then someone else REPLACING them and no one knowing about anyone else except for hindsight.

Existed as a hive mind, for lack of a better term from the age of about 9 to about two years ago, at 19-20ish. All sort of blended and half integrated. Seperated but NOT ENOUGH, if you get the idea.

Two years ago plus about a month, introduced to the idea of multiplicity and there was a forced split of all into seperate spaces, no more blending, no more coexistence, singular thought reigned.

For awhile it was OK and the last months, about six or eight of them, have just been so horrible, so chaotic and lacking in any form of cooperation it's just been a mess...

Recent count had frontspace up to around 10-12 active fronts, none of which were getting along well. The overall total is a helluva lot higher, ranging in the 60s for fronts, over 200 for "soulbonds" or other members and others unnumbered.

What do you do when you finally come to terms with the fact that you DO work better with fewer parts? Things got totally out of hand.

Partially to blame is some sort of innate ability to identify active perspectives of humanity in general, and society around the body and it "calls up" fragment-parts that have voices, that either fade back away pretty quick and leave a gaping hole or stick around, but are amorphous and not quite whole enough to really work together with anyone else...

Looking into perspectives. We're already working out some sort of... method for ourselves. Condensing where it's possible and organizing, sorting, getting things to work out. But looking for perspective... needing to see if others have had the same issue(s) and how they've worked with them/resolved them?

Comments

[sharpsight.livejournal.com]

N) Sort of. When Anja had taken over, were you still concious and thinking? (If so: wasn't it boring, not having a say in what got done?)

[linnai.livejournal.com]

It was fucking horrible... we basically got to sit around and watch her destroy herself emotionally. (obviously we were all conscious and thinking) Some of us were nowhere near the front space, though...

Anj has problems with not fitting in, or with people not accepting her because she's "different" and she thought by taking over... and really LOCKING everyone else down and out, she would be more acceptable.

[sharpsight.livejournal.com]

N) Ahh.

Thank you.

[sharpsight.livejournal.com]

N) (Was she aware of you/your thoughts during the locked-out time?)

[linnai.livejournal.com]

Conscious self denial comes to mind when I think of how I might answer that question. Anj says she didn't know... but none of us are sure if this is because she didn't share the same SPACE inside as we do or because she was in denial about what she was actually participating in and being a part of...