Question

[kuponutmalt.livejournal.com]

I'm fairly new here, but not to the multiple community. I was on DP for a while before the flaming got a bit too hot for my tastes. Er, I suppose I'll give a small introduction:

I'm nineteen--almost twenty--and female. Currently I'm the main front for my system of five, and I've been the only front for a couple years now (minus a couple of switches here and there). Now that I'm out of my parents' house for the majority of the year while I attend school, I've decided to seek a professional mental-health opinion and I'm considering the possibility of pursuing treatment for various social and anxiety related problems. The thing is, I'm going to school in Canada, so I've been entered into the endless bureaucracy of the socialist health care system, and given a lot of time to think while I'm waiting for my referral (from a counselor to a GP) to a psychiatrist.

At any rate, I'm not quite sure how to "break-in" my psychiatrist, if and when I actually get an appointment. There are a lot of things I could talk about: multiplicity, eating disorders, general social anxiety... But what exactly do you say to a mental health professional to help bring him or her up to speed with what you've known for years? While the counselor and GP I saw asked very specific and easy-to-answer questions, I had a brief appointment with a psychiatrist last winter who basically asked, "What can I do for you? What do you want to get better?" I mean, how am I supposed to answer something like that, when I'm not even sure why I'm seeking help in the first place?

I was just hoping, since many of you have therapists, that you may have some advice for someone starting into the intricate web of the mental health care system.

Comments

Welcome!

[ksol1460.livejournal.com]

Yeah, good old DP.. it ain't what it used to be, that's for sure. Sigh.

I mean, how am I supposed to answer something like that, when I'm not even sure why I'm seeking help in the first place?

Why are you seeking help? What made you decide to "seek a professional mental health opinion"? You say you have social anxiety and related problems -- maybe you could summarize those problems in such a way that you could explain it, kind of in outline form almost, to yourselves as well as the doctors.

To educate your therapist(s) that your multiplicity is not the problem, you might try the Layman's Guide Brochure. A newer edition of the brochure is here:

http://www.kitsune.cx/blackbirds/layman/new-brochure.pdf

Print that out and show it to him. Or let him look at the Layman's Guide itself at http://www.kitsune.cx/blackbirds/layman/

Good luck!

[luwana.livejournal.com]

Literally, just list the issues you think you have. with me it'd be depression, general anxiety, and possible forms of ADD which is badly affecting my school work.

Then, test the water. Try something small. Like, I mentioned I had a spirit guide. the reaction was very.... *nods, smiles* "Mmmmhmmm *writes* so tell me about your guide then *sweet smile*" so I didn't tell them anything else. But, if the reaction had been positive, I would then have said "I'm a therian and a multiple, that may or may not help you in thinking how to 'treat' me".

It's the angle I'd take. Basically make it clear that THIS is your problem, and THAT is just helpfull info. Once you have all the stuff down they /should/ start asking questions.


Having said that, I saw a psychiatrist and had the same problem. Sooooo many hours spent sat in silence, because she didn't ask questions, and I'm not a big talker, especially to people I don't trust.

[kuponutmalt.livejournal.com]

Thanks so much for the advice. I suppose I just need to find a phychiatrist I feel comfortable with. In fact, I may go back to that councellor at the student health center. I'm not particularly interested in getting pumped full of drugs.

[http://users.livejournal.com/-sinteria-/]

It's hard to say, I think I would feel the therapist out first, get to know him/her and maybe see if he/she is trustworthy before I went and spilled my heart and soul out. Then I'd do the break it gently over time technique LOL. Some t's have a difficult time believing, and some just won't at all. The issue of credibility comes into question at times and that in the past was difficult to cope with and caused some anger in our system. So from my viewpoint and that's just the personal one of don't let anyone get hurt, I say that taking time sometimes lends itself to better results. But then again it might be good to be very clear and up front, that way you could find out whether you are wasting your time or not. Really, I don't have a clear answer, because that's a tough question. ^_^

[shandra.livejournal.com]

I would advocate not wasting your time hiding stuff. I don't think that therapists or psychiatrists have to try to fix stuff that isn't broken, but I also think they cannot possibly help "you" if they don't know who you is/are.

I personally would go in and say "This is what you should know about me (multiple, orientation, religion, whatever); this is what I want to work on (eating disorder, whatever)." If it's the case that you don't want to work on your multiplicity, say "I'm not interested in exploring treatment for being multiple (even typing that made me wince:)), unless something specific comes up." And stand your ground politely but firmly.

Some pshrinks will, literally, bolt at this point. If so, good; you don't want them to bolt when you're half way through actually getting at something. If not, you have a winner.

I'd also recommend trying to get in with someone who's not a psychiatrist; psychiatrists are only trained, really, in the medical/pathological model and generally take a very pharmaceutical approach, so you may want someone in your support box who comes with a different background. Having said that some non-pshrinks are just as prescriptive and there are the rare pshrinks who haven't lost their entire humanity in medical school. Still. Good luck. :)

Shandra

[http://users.livejournal.com/-sinteria-/]

Yeah, you know the more I thought about what I said and then read what you said, I can agree with you. Why go half way through therapy to find out that your psychiatrist or therapist is going to dump you because they do not believe in a particular dx. It's happened in my case in the past, so when I went looking for the counselor I currently talk to I made sure that he specialized in the field before I bothered seeing him. This way I didn't have to explain the disorder, didn't have to do anything but come in and say, "This is what is going on, can you help?" So yes, I think your up front approach really is the only way of knowing whether or not it's going to work and not wasting time! ^_^ Please friend me!

[kuponutmalt.livejournal.com]

Thanks for the advice. When I went to see that psychiatrist, I tried to be up-front and honest (around my horrible nervousness), but he just seemed exasperated, even to the point of calling my multiplicity "this personality thing...", and just went on to ask, "Well, what can I diagnose you with?" *sigh* What a waste of money. I've been on this waiting list so long, I don't want to get someone I can't even trust. >_

[shandra.livejournal.com]

Ugh, gross. Wbat was your point of entry? You could try the local women's centre if you haven't. Sometimes their lists are slightly more helpful.

[kuponutmalt.livejournal.com]

I'm in Canada, so I've had to go through this route of seeing a free counselor who referred me to a general practitioner who could assess general risk and refer me to a psychiatrist. Since seeing the GP, I've been on the waiting list for a psychiatrist since last October.

[ex-khailitha846.livejournal.com]

When I was doing therapy (engaged on an endless quest for a therapist that was a good match and could actually offer some assistance) I would usually take the first couple sessions and interview them. I read a bunch of psychology books along the way, and so I could ask them what their philosophy was - were they Behavioral? Freudian? Humanist? Jungian? I would ask them WHY they chose their profession. I would ask them if they had been through therapy and what issues they had worked on. I would ask about their experience with and level of comfort around the issues I (and my system) were working on, what their personal beliefs were around it and how that affected their treatment model. I would tell them a little about what I wanted to work on and then ask them, "How do you see yourself helping me with this?"

And I would watch myself and the people in my system to see their reactions. Did it feel safe? Did We feel validated? Did this person believe that they were going to "fix" Us or did this person see themselves as helping Us find Our own answers?

Do your own research, if possible, and find out what psychological philosophies you feel an affinity for and look for these in the therapists you interview.

I found that We got more help from Jungian or Humanist therapists, and an amazing amount of support from a family therapist who was following the Namaste attachment model, even though, technically, he was Our son's therapist. In the end, We saw 13 different therapists in 8 years, some downright harmful and others immensely helpful.

So my advice would be to trust your instincts and your system. Remember, YOU are the client, they are getting paid to provide a service to you and if their services are not helping, walk away and find something that does.

Best wishes, sending light your way!

Jess for The Khailitha Collective

[kuponutmalt.livejournal.com]

Wow, that's a great idea! I never even considered that the interview could go the other way. Thanks so much!

Completely off-topic, how do your son and your system interract (if you don't mind me asking)? I'm mostly solitary, and pretty much a closet-multiple, so I don't really have any experience interracting with singlets other than my boyfriend.