Welcome to the fold I guess...

[kao-no-san.livejournal.com]

I had an epiphany... about two weeks ago, I started obssesivly listening to a song... but I really wasn't paying attention to the lyrics since they were soft. I just decided to go look at the lyrics..

My shadow's

Shedding skin and
I've been picking
Scabs again.
I'm down
Digging through
My old muscles
Looking for a clue.

I've been crawling on my belly
Clearing out what could've been.
I've been wallowing in my own confused
And insecure delusions
For a piece to cross me over
Or a word to guide me in.
I wanna feel the changes coming down.
I wanna know what I've been hiding in

My shadow.
Change is coming through my shadow.
My shadow's shedding skin
I've been picking
My scabs again.

I've been crawling on my belly
Clearing out what could've been.
I've been wallowing in my own chaotic
And insecure delusions.

I wanna feel the change consume me,
Feel the outside turning in.
I wanna feel the metamorphosis and
Cleansing I've endured within

My shadow
Change is coming.
Now is my time.
Listen to my muscle memory.
Contemplate what I've been clinging to.
Forty-six and two ahead of me.

I choose to live and to
Grow, take and give and to
Move, learn and love and to
Cry, kill and die and to
Be, paranoid and to
Lie, hate and fear and to
Do, what it takes to move through.

I choose to live and to
Lie, kill and give and to
Die, learn and love and to
Do, what it takes to step through.

See my shadow changing,
Stretching up and over me.
Soften this old armor.
Hoping I can clear the way
By stepping through my shadow,
Coming out the other side.
Step into the shadow.
Forty six and two are just ahead of me.

Somone has been trying to tell me something as they come out, but no one was listening. I guess they are still forming, but I am going to take this as confirmation what a few of us have been suspecting, that someone else is either forming, or coming out of hiding. Because just as I started listening to this song so much, that's when all this can't remembering things started.

[cross posted in my journal]

Comments

[ex-khailitha846.livejournal.com]

It's wierd how things will shift around for a while and than all of a sudden I realize that it's because We've got another one "awake." I had some early adolescent girls (a little mob of them) wake up recently and things got pretty wiggy until I realized it was all coming from them.

And the process of introducing them to the system, the life, the fact that 30 years have gone by... that was no walk in the park.

I've also had a new thing start... the hearing them talking among themselves when I'm drifting off to sleep or waking up.

I think the hardest thing about all this is the sense that there is alot going on and I DON'T KNOW WHAT IT IS UNTIL THEY LET ME KNOW.

I guess that is when it really hit home that I am sharing my body... the fact that I can't hear their thoughts. I can only infer what's going on through the trails and traces that they leave laying around.

How co-conscious are you? I know when a new one shows up, there is alot of disorientation. Can you somehow figure out how to be there as they walk around and try to orient themselves to what is going on? It really helps. Or write them little notes... or something.

Sending light to you all and greetings to the new one...

[kao-no-san.livejournal.com]

Orin seems to be helping big time, he's the best so far out of all of us as far as being responsible. We are co-concious, though the disorientation at the moment is coming from the new one as they are learning the system. Silvaren is getting impressions off of them, sort of like a mental sharing. Silvaren doesn't talk, ever. She communicates by mental impression, she can project, usually only to Blood, but she can percive the others as well and then share it with everyone. Which is what she is doing right now with the new one, since they don't seem to be talking much, they are just as confused at the moment it seems, but apparently the new one has taken a liking to Jessica, sees her as a daughter. This makes Orin convinced he's the only male in the system. ^_^

Thanks for that note idea.. I think Silvaren might be the one to give us all the most help in making the new one at home.