(no subject)

[relevancedenied.livejournal.com]

This was cut because I'm not trying to cause more drama, I'm trying to end it.

I would just like to make very clear, to everyone, once and for all- my community everydaydid is NOT AT ALL against ANYONE. It is a community FOR a specific type of people, just like any soulbonding community or otherkin community.



EDIT

I have altered the userinfo. Please take a look, let me know what you think.

Comments

[fairly.livejournal.com]

I agree with this comment. :)

[igemelli.livejournal.com]

Thirded. I actually think a group specifically focused on more DID-related issues and systems is a pretty good idea, and I understand that they want to be clear that it is for a particular type of system, but the userinfo does seem a bit confrontational and contemptuous. Maybe the OP could try toning it down while keeping it clear that the community is not for discussion of that variety of plurality?

[relevancedenied.livejournal.com]

I intend to do so, thank you for your comment.

[our-dry-cellar.livejournal.com]

* Totally.

If some people can't see the difference between:

1)making a community FOR a certain group of people

and

2)making a community for a certain group of people who are seemingly AGAINST a certain something and then going out of your way to say "We don't want you in our club!" and then mocking it in your user info...

then some people just can't be helped. *

[padawanagain.livejournal.com]

*grunt*

Way to insult a whole bunch of people.

[relevancedenied.livejournal.com]

Pardon?

[padawanagain.livejournal.com]

then some people just can't be helped...

He said that if people couldn't tell the difference [with your original user info] then we couldn't be helped.

Pretty insulting to a lot of people.

It's obvious that people didn't understand.

[our-dry-cellar.livejournal.com]

* That wasn't me being insulting. That was me stating the obvious.

And by "People" I meant the OP who has since fixed the issue (so obviously THEY could be helped, rendering the statement moot) not your precious self. My problems with them are over, so mind your business.

Furthermore, can you not tell the difference between making a community geared toward a select group of people and making a community just to SHUN a group of people and treat them like retards in the user info? Because I think it's a pretty simple concept. *

[padawanagain.livejournal.com]

My precious self?

Touchy.

As for the community info, it sucked balls. It pretty much negated everyone who didn't have a 'classic alter'.

[our-dry-cellar.livejournal.com]

* Touchy, no. I just like to fight on the internet and I tend to find a good excuse when people I don't know try and criticize me.

I wasn't even being that offensive. For me.

And yes it did. Which was my point. Also, the whole "I'm a 14 year old and I have [insert Final Fantasy character] in my head lol!11!!1!".

That was the problem.

The problem has since gone away. *

[tajuujinkaku.livejournal.com]

I said this a moment ago in response to another comment here (http://community.livejournal.com/multiplicity/746918.html), I think it's pretty relevent.

I'm not going to question each of the members as to whether or not they are soulbonders or otherkin. If [as you said] no one would be the wiser, and the posts are on topic, it isn't a problem. It isn't disbelief in ALL cases, because I think every kind of multiplicity has its fair share of fakers. There really aren't ulterior motives. I really and truly just wanted a place where people that did not understand/identify with soulbonders (and such) could go to talk.

My rules are also partly a precaution against posts such as "I RP more than I eat and now my muses are separate beings!" and "Hey, I'm Tifa from Final Fantasy, but I don't know much about myself because I've never played the game! Whoops!"

These sorts of posts rub me (and others I've discussed this with) the wrong way. I guess you could say I'm sensitive when it comes to people that could be/are pretending to be multiple, just for the sake of doing it. I'm sorry if that seems outrageous.

[relevancedenied.livejournal.com]

Please give a look now.

[igemelli.livejournal.com]

I do understand wanting a place for a particular brand of multiplicity. There are comms for bonders who are not necessarily plural, why not the other way around? However, I have to admit that I felt a bit uncertain about the community myself - on the one hand I wouldn't mind joining because our system, while not DID-origin as such, is very unmagical and un-woo-woo; on the other hand, I do have muses/bonds/whatever, though they're sort of "old-school bonds" rather than being the sort that generally front or post on LJ, and sometimes it feels almost like a different thing from my plurality entirely. Could you maybe clarify whether I'd be welcome there? (Not "I won't turn anyone away", but an honest answer as to whether I would be welcome. If not, that is absolutely fine.)

[igemelli.livejournal.com]

(Never mind - just seen the new userinfo, which is much clearer - thankyou!)

[relevancedenied.livejournal.com]

Glad I could be understood a bit better. ^-^

[relevancedenied.livejournal.com]

:] Fantastic!

[weirdiguess.livejournal.com]

Thank you for that comment, this post, and the user info rewording. It's a *lot* clearer now. I (and I'm sure a lot of others) quite sympathise with your feelings on this. Michael in particular doesn't relate to Soulbond/otherkin types, and that leaves us with a lot of trouble as to what communities he can actually join without annoying him.

Ofc, we don't really relate to DID types either (a problem that's cropped up with multiplicity), but we'll see how it goes.


I think my main problem was that, having been here (and main front running) for quite a few years now, I find my otherkin background to be a kind of side note I drop in if people ask a related question, and little more. Right now my most pressing issue is how often a person has to front before caving to their clothing tastes isn't a waste of money, and I was concerned that such questions, or my input on them, would be disallowed because of my background. This new wording is great!

Ofc, now I just hope you don't get flooded by overeager SBers trying to prove a point. I'm joining Michael up because, as I said, finding a comm he can actually relate to has been a problem for us recently.


~Selene

[overlord-mordax.livejournal.com]

I think lisandrayajuujo is right, some people may have felt threatened/attacked because of the negetive conotations in your user profile. Also, obviously you're not responsible for everything your members say, but one of the posts on your community that I happened to see WAS very negetive toward soulbonders.

[cirape.livejournal.com]

The thing is, there are already communities for that (didsupport for one, and I'm sure there are tons of others). And, yes, there are tons of communities for muses/soulbonds/other kin/other 'weird shit' or whatever one wants to call it...but generally they tend to allow non-whatevers to join. I've not seen one SB community that says 'If you don't bond you can't join.'
The fact that you put something similar to that is what makes people think its a group for excluding others, which is what seems to be making them upset.
Perhaps a rewording of your info is in order? Maybe simply a 'please don't talk about this' sort of thing. Something, you know, nice and polite.

[tajuujinkaku.livejournal.com]

I feel that it is rather different from didsupport, as didsupport leans more toward pro-integration and trauma-based systems.

Perhaps a rewording IS in order.

[cirape.livejournal.com]

It does? I do know that founder has issues with their DID and dislikes it, but I was not aware that the whole community was for intergration. I do know its more so for the clinical model of DID than anything else, so its not QUITE what your comm is trying for.

I think it is. It could solve a lot of this.

[relevancedenied.livejournal.com]

In the didsupport user info:

- While a lot of people, especially in preexisting lj communities are pro-multiplicity, this is a community more geared towards pro-intigration. While people with both views are welcome, understand that the focus of this group is more pro-integration/support for bad experiences with DID/child abuse based.

[cirape.livejournal.com]

Ah, sorry.
Its been awhile since I read their user info. I mostly just skim the comm.

There are other comms out there for non-SB/otherkin/etc multiplicity however, but I'm afraid their names escape me at the moment.

[relevancedenied.livejournal.com]

It true that there are, but unfortunately many are extremely inactive. And there are no rules against more than one community for the same thing, eh? :]

[cirape.livejournal.com]

No, and I'm sorry if it looked like I was saying such.
What I meant was it was the 'there's already comms for this' PLUS the 'we think your info is mean/excluding' that seemed to be making people upset.

[cirape.livejournal.com]

Btw, I like how your new wording turned out. Hopefully that'll stop any drama over this.

[relevancedenied.livejournal.com]

Thank you. :]

[cirape.livejournal.com]

Btw...your previous arguments about people trying to find help for trama based multiplicity do not appear to jive with the user info on your community.
But perhaps I'm reading it wrong.

[tajuujinkaku.livejournal.com]

That was just an example.

[cirape.livejournal.com]

I see.
Perhaps you should think about what you're using as an example and what you've written elsewhere before stating said example (multiple times, even).

[relevancedenied.livejournal.com]

It was obviously an example- it started with "Say for instance" or something along those lines. I just as easily could have said, "Say for instance you are having issues with soulbonding". It was just a random example, that was pretty clear.

[cirape.livejournal.com]

I understand the word example.
What I don't think you understand is that it seemed you were implying your community was a good place for this fictional trama-based system to go to, when, in fact, your community states its for "It is for natural and perfectly (most of the time) functioning multiplicity, also!"

[relevancedenied.livejournal.com]

I'm sorry, I missed this comment. I just wanted to make one more thing a bit clearer- I wasn't saying that the fictional trauma-based system should go to MY community, but that it would want to go to a community relevant to it. That's all.

[cirape.livejournal.com]

I see. Poor wording again.

[relevancedenied.livejournal.com]

I have to disagree in this case.

"Say you were a traditional trauma-based system, and you have a question relating to trauma-based multiplicity, coping, etc. Would you rather ask your question in a place that is 75% soulbonders, or a place with a more even ratio? We can learn things about others by being in a diverse community, but it's not as easy to learn things about ourselves."

I didn't even mention my own community.

[cirape.livejournal.com]

No, but you were using it to defend the existance of your community. Even if you didn't mean it, I'm sure many jumped to the same conclusion that I did.

[our-dry-cellar.livejournal.com]

Yes, the new user info is better.

[relevancedenied.livejournal.com]

Great! :]

[inmonopolus.livejournal.com]

Brilliant. I appreciate that you were willing to change it. <3 Thank you.

[relevancedenied.livejournal.com]

Thank you. :]

[fairly.livejournal.com]

Thank you for changing the wording; it's so much better now. :)

[relevancedenied.livejournal.com]

I'm glad!

[coldironkiss.livejournal.com]

Thanks for the rewrite. We thought it looked like a good place to join, but weren't sure if it was appropriate to do so. (Several Otherkin, one insourced soulbond, but it's generally not relevant to what we have to say about multiplicity.) It sounds different from and complementary to the other active comms we know about, so we're glad to have it around. ^^

- No one in particular (ugh, blendy)

[ksol1460.livejournal.com]

I'm as glad as everyone else that you changed it -- I'm a nonhuman soulbonder in a gateway system. But:

Disagreement is not drama. The discussion you're referring to (http://community.livejournal.com/multiplicity/745999.html), and this post which was inspired by it (http://community.livejournal.com/multiplicity/747159.html), are some of the kinds of things I want on this community. No flaming, no snarking, but reasoned debate, even if emotions run high.

This is what I had in mind when Andy and I came aboard as admins nearly two years ago... people with a wide variety of opinions discussing issues and coming to common ground, or not. That isn't drama. Click here for drama (http://community.livejournal.com/multiplicity/69166.html).

Thank you for not deleting your post; thank you for changing the info on your new community. Good luck with it.

[relevancedenied.livejournal.com]

You make a very good point. I guess I just worry a lot that I'm causing trouble.