We did NOTHING!

[castledwellers.livejournal.com]

We had a horrible day... It was so hard to not loose every ounce of stability we have created over the past 10 years.  How do you come to the place where you are no longer responsible for those after you who were hurt because you did NOTHING?  How do you forgive yourself when you are haunted with the torment of potential victims? 

Today in class, we had the prof talking about one of her clients, she IS an SRA victim. It was all I could do to keep the others from getting up and running from the room, and I wonder, how can we do this, how can we possible hear these stories? But it wasn't so much that, but the fact that it was here, in this city that it happened to us, what if this little girl is mixed up in the same group? What if we had done something? Maybe she wouldn't be tortured. The prof only suspects this, but the girl wont speak. Because of that the prof can't get a judge to have her removed from the home. I wanted to tell her, I wanted to scream... what if its the same people?!!? It was so triggering everything went numb, everything shut down... must not leave...

Can't shake it cant shake the pictures are so horrible just stop it just stop giving it to me im sorry i cant help you just stop tearing me apart!!!!!!!!!!

Comments

[linnai.livejournal.com]

Your responsibility has to be first to yourselves. As hard as this can be for you, and also for other people to understand, this is the ultimate truth you have to consider. You must protect and heal and support yourselves before you can help to protect or support or heal other people. It's difficult. When you have been through something so horrible, it is reasonable to want to protect other people from that. But in all the world, you have only one interface to work with, two hands, two feet, one mouth, two eyes, etc. Grow, heal, learn yourselves and how to deal with facing these things. When you are stronger, when it isn't so fresh and raw and painful, then there are things you can do, to challenge yourselves, to challenge others, to open the public eyes and to help protect others.

Every child should be protected. But only one person can't do all that. It will take every person to protect every child.

Be well, breathe deep, find your healing and safest place.

[castledwellers.livejournal.com]

Thank you for your wise words ... we do understand that before we can help others, we must heal ourselves... It was such a shock to have it come up in a vocational counseling class... I suppose that shows us that anyone can come to us for help with something so seemingly innocuous, and it turn into something much more intense. It is times like this I wonder if we are really able to become counselors.