(no subject)

[resequence.livejournal.com]

Hello~ My name is Seth. I was originally in this community over a year ago, under like..a dozen different names (a few like antixschism, lostxfrequency, etc., etc.). It had been a genuinely stupid time in my life in particular, and a lot of soul-searching had been done from the summer of last year until now.

I am the host, core, whatever it is you call it, and I had spent much of that year hiding. Or I think I was. I'm not entirely sure, because while part of me says I was In, another says I was really Out, and was just fooling myself into thinking I was In. Back then, I had thought that there were..a lot of people here, who really weren't. It was a perpetuating cycle in a stupid time, I won't bother you with the details. But in the summer, I sat down and began sorting things out.

I think I put everything on temporary lockdown, and locked everyone out until only recently. I did a lot of soul-searching and reorganizing of my thoughts, and yeah. I felt bad for the lockdown once I realized what I did, but I'm more comfortable as a singular person, which is more than I could have said for back then. There are much fewer people, but they're really there. I can tell that much. It feels much more like home now, and all is well.

Our system has no name, we're just sorta. Well. Us, I guess. No one really gets to come out as much anymore, because I dropped out of high school, and have been taking a break from school before I go to college. So, it's been a lot of time at home. With mum. When she isn't home there's plenty of time for everyone, though, at the very least. I'd introduce the guys and gals, but eh heh, it's almost 3 AM, and we gotta wake up early tomorrow. I'm sure they'll do it on their own, anyways.

OH. And a quick, random question: I was diagnosed with paranoid schizophrenia when I was 14 (I'm turning 19 next month), and was wondering if anyone else here has both multiplicity and schizophrenia as well? Because for the past year, I'll hear voices of people (the same ones, too. Not random ones), just sort of talking. But not to me. And normally in different languages, which is weird, since I can't speak any other languages (not fluently, at least). And I was wondering if it's just a product of the schizophrenia, or maybe it's someone else that I don't know of?

I am seriously out-of-touch with stuff now, ever since I did the lockdown. So I'm, uh, readjusting. Please pardon my stupid. D:

Also, how do you differentiate between what someone is saying, and what's a product of the schiz? Because I am seriously getting really confused by this. (It also doesn't help that it brings up a lot of self-doubt and like "OHGOD but what if THEY'RE just from the schizophrenia too!?". And then I get yelled at for thinking something stupid, so uh. Yeah).

By the way, we don't actually use this journal. It's an old one, renamed, and I didn't think it'd be wise to add this comm to my friends list on my actual journal. If you wanna be our friend, you can add us over at flow_theory; posts by everyone will be filtered there, so. Yup. Friends are awesome, y'know?! *Over-enthusiastic moment, OMG*

Nice to meet you all~

Comments

[rhymer-713.livejournal.com]

Hey!! We remember you!!! We'll add you!!! Friendship is teh awesome!!

[catskillmarina.livejournal.com]

I absolutly love your icon. It reminds us of the song 'Girl who has never been' by Escape
Key. Not sure i can say much here about schitz. We did make a post in our journal with an
interesting theory about it.

--- Miri of Mtribe

[catskillmarina.livejournal.com]

http://www.cyphertext.net/escapekey/songs.html

Ths download for the song is there.

--- Miri of Mtribe

[teh-kerry.livejournal.com]

Nick who's in our system is schizophrenic, which carries over when he's out. The body/Kerry our original/whatever isn't, though. The symptoms, hallucinations, paranoia etc, are only present in the body when he is.

Jet xXx

[parascientifics.livejournal.com]

[zamisista.livejournal.com]

wonder if its really schizophrenia? we had (visual) hallucinations and of course there are always plenty of voices in the head. but when everyone gets to establish good communication and agree to groundrules the chaos subsided and now we know who is speaking when. the hallucinations were because of the posttraumatic stress and they went away when we did emdr (it is a form of therapy) for the ones that had ptsd.

we were diagnosed with bipolar/ manic depression because some of us were very sad and suicidal and some of us were very positive and getting things done. we think pschiatrists always want it to be a chemical or biological problem, instead of recognizing that lots of things that happen in multiples look like "symptoms" in singletons.

we all hav different accents, dont know about languages but it seems possible.

why not try to relax and ask whoever is talking who they are and what they would like to share with you? give them the benefit of the doubt since they seem to be trying to communicate. it seems rude to think that people are hallucinations or symptoms just because you dont know who they are.

there is a lot that goes on inside multiples that the 'host' doesnt necessarily know about!

a few of us contributed to this post
J system

[seaclans.livejournal.com]

I've been diagnosed with that too. But even when we've had complete mental breakdowns we can look back and trace them to having conciously or unconciously shut out everything connected to the multiplicity, then something comes along and blows all our walls down and chaos ensues. I think that for us the diagnosis is inaccurate. Many of our people operate in different reality bases that don't translate at all well when the flood out into the real world. It often feels like dreaming while awake. Also almost all of our events included no longer sleeping, which will cause all kinds of hallucinations and delusions.

Mostly I'd say give your experiences the benefit of the doubt, talk to those who speak with you or speak in the background. And then balance it all by taking it with a grain of salt. Something can be real, but not be something that it makes sense to act on out her.

Geesh I'm not saying any of this well. Basically, don't drive yourself/ves crazy trying to figure out if you are crazy or not. And take whatever data your mind supplies and filter it for usefulness.

Arrg. Apparently not a good day for communicating, sorry.

[ksol1460.livejournal.com]

Have you considered the possibility that you are not really schizophrenic just because one doctor (who may have had his own agenda) said you were? I mean, did you ever get a second or third opinion? Recently? Just because you hear voices doesn't make you mentally ill (http://www.hearing-voices.org/).

[ksol1460.livejournal.com]

You are very welcome! There is tons of stuff out there on alternative ways of looking at what might seem to be unusual experiences.

Heck, we've always heard music, and as we've gotten older we've started to hear voices as well. It just sounds like listening to a radio. Once we got part of an NPR news report by Carl Castle.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hearing_Voices_Movement