Parts vs. Alters

[yellowsub723.livejournal.com]

I wanted to start this strand out in the open, as it was embedded in comments regarding a book.

This is an interesting post, because I've become very comfortable describing our system as parts. This is my way of rejecting the terms normally associated with a strict DID medical model. I find the term alter extremely problematic for us. We are not being taken over. We work together and have a great deal of co-consciousness. No problem with others using these terms, I'm just interested in your perspectives on this issue. All of my parts understand that they are whole individuals with separate identities that are validated and that they are concurrently part of a system that the outside world recognize as a whole. In terms of the trauma model, we are certainly a product of some attachment disruptions, but in terms of clinical literature, certain trauma models such as IFS are actually developed in response to the idea that dissociative phenomena are inherently pathological. This type of model hypothesizes a spectrum of multiplicity. No apparant physical/sexual trauma experiences here.

Comments

[tej-agni.livejournal.com]

There isn't anything that says you have to use what other people use. If you're all comfortable using the word "parts", then that's fine. I don't use it when I'm talking about everyone because a part is a piece of a whole. that's why it's a part. I think everyone would be a little offended if I called them a "part". lol Instead of just using their name or saying my friends or the others. The word "alter" isn't even used in this group I don't think. Of course, I think this group enjoys creating their own words and definitions for things. lol I've noticed that.

-Butterfly

[forever-alone.livejournal.com]

I have no idea how we all got here, but even if we're splits resulting from trauma or whatever, I'd never call the others parts and I'd never want them to call me that. I'm a person, not a part of a person. I guess there are two ways to understand the word (part of a collective vs. a piece of something), but when it comes to multiplicity it's usually used to mean a piece of something, so I dislike the term.

I think "alters" is pretty insulting because it implies ownership, like everyone belongs to one certain person. The only term I hate more is "ego states." Whoever thought that one up needs to be beaten with some sort of blunt object.


-v2 with a little help from Sanji&Cherry

[hydra-system.livejournal.com]

I use the term inner people. My psychiatirst uses parts and alters, which aren't words we would use for ourself, but we aren't particularly offended by his use of the terms. They are just words, and don't take his use of them personally.

[etana.livejournal.com]

I use the term "persons" or "people" to describe others inside. I hate the term "alters" and "other" is riddled in psychoanalytical BS. Not interested.

[aquilawolf.livejournal.com]

I have sometimes used the word part, as in 'part of me', but my perspective is that we are a collective and as I front a lot and am sometimes rather a spokesperson for those that either don't front or don't talk, it can feel natural. I am also involved in several groups in the outside world and might say something like,'yea, I'm part of that group', even though by myself I am a whole person. I also am rather into non-duality, the spiritual perspective that none of us is separate and all is one wholeness.

My system at this time is not striving for further individualization rather cooperation, respect, love and allowing natural expression which means if I'm out walking and someone else wants to do that, I let them come up.

The word alter in not something we use at all.

Long ramble ahead!

[sethrenn.livejournal.com]

Well... we kind of got shuffled around between therapists by the parental units from the time we were six, although there, most of what appeared to be "wrong" with us was actually due to exterior factors. Most of what caused the problems, frankly, was school and family stuff. There were only two of them to whom we ever told "there are other people in here," and neither of them ever used the word "alter"-- they would always say "the parts of you" or "the pieces of you." At one point, we were kind of beguiled by the idea that "when you bring them all together, you'll be happy again, you'll be healthy and whole and everything will go right for you all of a sudden." Seriously, one of these therapists was practically making it sound like a kind of magic fix, and the "integration fixes everything" literature that was so prevalent at the time (early 90s) all supported that view also. (And we were reading all of it that we could get our hands on, secretly, even when no one knew we were plural.)

The thing was, when we interacted in here, in-system, even though the books insisted that these were dissociated pieces of an original, the way in which we interacted really didn't seem to bear that out. It really was just like a bunch of separate people who'd gathered in a room to talk. But we tried, for a while, to keep thinking of them as parts who'd all be merged back into some kind of uber-self someday, even though we actually liked the feeling of having a team in here, despite nearly all The Books saying that everything would be better after integration.

I think that's why we switched over at one point to saying "these are my characters who live in my head"-- it felt slightly more right to allow them that degree of autonomy than to decide they'd split from an original, even if it wasn't fully accurate either.

However, that's our experience. If someone really does experience the presence of others as splits or parts of an original, I don't object to their using the terminology for themselves.

[athousandmoons.livejournal.com]

I use a bunch of terms, depending on the situation. I use "parts" when I'm talking to my psychiatrist and psychologist, although the psychiatrist usually says "alters". None of us mind "parts", although "alters" is a little strange. Then I use "others" in casual conversation, when I don't feel like using anything longer. Sometimes in conversations with people who understand, I say "people" because that's what they are to me.

For other persons, I try to use "people" or just say "your system" or "your group", if it's more appropriate. I wouldn't say "parts" or "alters" to another person unless that person used the term to describe themselves first.

But then, I don't have DID. I tend to use the words I've found in the multiplicity glossary or, in some cases, that I've made up myself.

[chaostiny.livejournal.com]

I use the word "parts" on ocassion because in my case, many of the others here have proven to be parts of others or parts of me and as they get healthy, they just slowly drift into whoever they came from. (WHEW!) But, when I am referring to them in every day life, I say "them" or "the others" or something like that. I hate the term alters... it just offends in so many ways! I have several friends off-line who are multiple and I try to be very respectful and use whatever terminology they use when I am around them. For the most part, I figure they are just words so I don't get too offended if someone uses a word I don't like.

[rabbitsystem.livejournal.com]

We rarely use any term at all, but when we do it's 'others' or for preference 'headmates'. Among ourselves we'll use the term 'brother-self' or 'sister-self', meaning 'the self (person/consciousness) who is my sibling'. It's probably easy to misinterpret as having a really-a-part-of-me connotation, but it suits us.

[mirrorbrothers.livejournal.com]

You can describe your own system with whatever words you like, but to me, the term "part" implies something that's not complete - a fragment or component - so I really don't like it. I'm a whole person in circumstances of reduced corporeal access. We often just refer to each other as "brother;" our preferred generic term is "headmate."

Johnny

[shandra.livejournal.com]

We use people, or each other's names. Our therapist uses parts and we discussed that with her a bit and agreed that it was "parts of our system" and not "parts of A PERSON." Because that doesn't describe really almost any of us. Still it isn't a term we find very comfortable. We see people as interdependent and responsible to each other, so there wasn't a need to draw a line in the sand in order to preserve a sense of unity.

Alters was definitely out for us for various reasons.

[yellowsub723.livejournal.com]

Thanks for articulating this. It is helpful to us in thinking about this issue. Parts of the system makes alot more sense for us, I just hadn't been able to find direct language to communicate it yet.

[aquilawolf.livejournal.com]

On reflection, this makes the most sense to me: 'parts of our system', yet I couldn't really use that terminology with someone who didn't know I was multiple, or didn't accept it to well (like my sister), so then I would say 'part of me', but I definitely like 'part of my system' better and have used that as well.

[ex-pinkmonk.livejournal.com]

"Alters" doesn't fit for any of us, either, though we've used it because it's a convenient placeholder, and we don't sweat the labels too much. There is never a time when only one person is aware and fronting - it's always a cooperative effort, so no one is an alter of anything. "Parts" makes more sense because the system is an Art Collective, so they are indeed parts of their own small society-project. Which happens to be inside my body. ;)

[crystalseraph.livejournal.com]

I tend to call them fairly casually - the guys, the gang, group or others, whichever one fits into my speech XD

Parts doesn't work for us, and alters reminds me of an anime I don't like, so lol...

I don't really think of innerworld people as parts, tbh. It seems mildly offensive to me.

[mirrorbrothers.livejournal.com]

*snicker* You mean Scryed? Man, now I'm gonna think of that, too, whenever I hear the term. Thanks a lot. :-p

Johnny

[crystalseraph.livejournal.com]

Yeah, Scryed XD

That anime is so lol. Sadly, its the sort of thing Tyb likes XD

The others refer to us as the collective, or just by name. Rach calls Tyb "the meathead" but otherwise...