Some people can be so dumb

[angel530.livejournal.com]

Sorry for the rant but silence_rising posted to a forum to tell them she was multiple, which for various reasons wed agreed was ok because of the reason she was posting it there in the first place.

Anyway, in general most of the replies had been very positive. However there was this one that has annoyed both of us:


I'm just going to assume that you are being on the level and not just having us on.

Mental illness, especially one as dramatic as multiple personality disorder, is something that I wouldn't advise sharing with anyone but those that you are very, very close to as it is bound to scare people off.

According to my father who is a prominent psychologist (past president and honourary president of the Canadian Psychological Association, founder and editor of Canadian Psychologist Magazine, Professor Emeritus at University etc, etc) the general consensus within the psychological/psychiatric community is that multiple personality disorder does not exist, at least not outside the pages of novels and movie screens. Though there a few who do believe in it. However you certainly are unusual in that you are aware of all your personalities. Are you in treatment? Because one of the goals of such treatment is to help you to realize that there are not really 10 personalities within you but one that for some reason has fragmented. I'm curious as to when you become aware of your disorder? And how you become aware of it? If you wouldn't mind sharing

Comments

[catskillmarina.livejournal.com]

I hate that shit.....

...Though in some ways i can agree with it. Multiplicity is
simply a variant. Just like anything else, people
can have problems adjusting to it. When people who are multiple
have problems adjusting to it and their system becomes chaoitc
it is sometimes called MPD.

Remember that even by the DSM there is no D.I.D. unless the
condition causes someone to have problems functioning.

There is no real pattern in our culture for people to express
their multiplicity exept for insanity. In other cultures there
are tradtions that help people to figure it out.

I was SO SO greatfull to find the functional multiplicty websites.
In many ways they saved me from going through a lot of
unneccesary chaos.

--- Marina

--- Marina

[catskillmarina.livejournal.com]

.... and i have discussed my position on this with
a loved one who is a research psychiatrist.

When she saw us and figured out what was going on
she said:

"I had never seen the non-pathological version of the
variant" and happilly accepted us.

Duh - only people who are in distress go to psychiatrists ;-)

--- Marina

[squnq.livejournal.com]

Well, it's entirely natural to be met with skepticism, and people are entirely entitled to their opinions if they're being presented in a polite manner, as this person's clearly is.

[angel530.livejournal.com]

Skepticism I can deal with and expect but theres something else about this reply that has bothered me. I just cant put my finger on what

[bekkle.livejournal.com]

ignorance is everywhere with this "disorder", we can't really expect people to be aware. at least this person is slightly informed and seemingly open to discussion!

[catskillmarina.livejournal.com]

Hmmmm.... That statement of that therapist was a bit odd.

[sethrenn.livejournal.com]

There seem to be a certain amount of people out there who believe they are being good, kind, wonderful and saintly by approaching you with what superficially appears to be praise (and they seem to really think it is praise). As soon as someone starts telling me that I or some group of people I can be slotted into are more psychic, more spiritual, more empathic, more Special, or in any other way trying to pull me in with the Tendrils of Happy Spiritual Love and Praise, I run away very fast. It's like someone telling you they're "fascinated" by you-- that's all I need to shut down communication. I think Astraea talked about this once also.

I don't see it as praise, but as a very specific form of exploitation-- you basically become a ticket for someone else to feel good about themselves, because they believe they're helping you by integrating you and "thanking the parts of you" and whatnot, even if you perceive it as anything but help. They think you should be so grateful to them for "helping," and because they're "trying to help the rest of the world understand and appreciate you." (Even if all they're trying to get people to "understand" is their own, highly distorted notion of what you are, and the qualities they claim you to have that should be "appreciated" aren't ones you perceive yourself to have at all.)

And when you don't want to be part of it, they start in with the "But I'm trying to HEEEELP!" business, and maybe cry a bit about how you've hurt them. (Because clearly if they're trying to help, they can do no wrong and can't ever make mistakes. *eyeroll*)

[vox-vocis-vita.livejournal.com]

Something kinda similar, happened to my husbands other, except she didn't come out herself, she was found out. I posted about it here a while back. Basically she became a member of a decently sized online community, had some fun just being herself and making friends.

Some really nosy member decided to dig up some dirt on her for whatever reason. I heard it was because she did behave like a "normal" girl. Makes me wonder how a normal girl is supposed to behave.

So they searched through google for her email address and found a post on another forum, discussing the multiple aspect. They forced her to come clean about it and she was met with some hurtful comments, but I think the majority of people were pretty ok with it.

Most of the negative responses she received where along the lines of her just being a "character" or "mask" her host wears online. She wasn't real, not even in the fragmented sense, she was just my husband pretending to be someone else. Like roleplaying or something.

Someone even had the nerve to refer to her by my husbands name and tell her to "Just be yourself, (insert hosts name here)."

[angel530.livejournal.com]

Yeah i think i remember that post. I dont often comment or post here but I read it.

It doesnt surprise me though. I almost expect comment like that now! But ... I dont know, it just doesnt seem something I should HAVE to get used to

[angel530.livejournal.com]

It was a pagan forum. Shes been posting there for a while.

Will let you know the reply when we have it :)

[silence-rising.livejournal.com]

You have the link now so youll probably see this anyway but her reply was:

I will respond to this more fully later this evening (we have some people coming over for dinner and I'm just running around like a chicken with its' head cut off trying to get ready). I'm not about to play armchair psychiatrist but I would say that constantly refering to yourself as "we" is likely to have an extremely debilatating effect on your social life. I'm not trying to be mean here at all--just honest!

Anyhoo, talk later..


Im not even going to say what I think about that!!

[overlord-mordax.livejournal.com]

I think the most offesnsive thing about that reply is how she was waving around second had accreditations and crying 'disorder. disorder. disorder.'

[silence-rising.livejournal.com]

Exactly. She seems to think that because her father is a psych she knows how it must be for us and because we all know about each other that its somehow very strange and we must be in therapy for it (which we are, were just not in therapy for multiplicity because we dont need it)

[redrainstorm.livejournal.com]

This is no longer a surprising response to us. Most people believe this for one reason or another. It's frustrating as hell, especially now as we consider seeing a therapist. But, it's like arguing with a brick wall...

[sethrenn.livejournal.com]

What forum/group/whatever was this on?

(Please always feel free to link to our webpage or Layman's Guide or any of the others listed in the userinfo. (Lilac says, "it's great when you can make them eat their words by proving that you actually know much more about the topic than they do."))

[silence-rising.livejournal.com]

Thats an idea. Was too wound up to even thinking about linking to your page. Might just do that :)

Thanks

It was a pagan forum

[kangetsuhime.livejournal.com]

A good reply would be:

"Shut up, you fucking retard."

Because really, it holds about as much weight.

Even with the mindless "well, *I* heard that it probably doesn't exist, and *I* think I know everything becasue *my* daddy is a very important man", you can JUST live with it. She's just so ignorant it'd make your brain bleed. I'm sure the lack of will to actually look things up and find out what she's talking about is merely some undiagnosed disorder she'll deny she has.

But the "omg, don't tell anybody except those close to you", is the biggest load of unhealthy tripe I have heard in my life.

It's like what they used to tell rape victims. Shh, don't tell anyone. Like it's something to be ashamed of, something to hide and cry about in dark corners, because people might go "ewwww, freak" if they heard. Well they knocked that down as tripe, and this is just as bad.

Maybe she should be asked if she thinks black people should wear face paint in case somebody sees their skin colour and freaks out.

[silence-rising.livejournal.com]

But the "omg, don't tell anybody except those close to you", is the biggest load of unhealthy tripe I have heard in my life.

Precisely! And as if we hadnt heard that enough already in our lives. Everything is always "Dont tell anyone", "Youll be hated if you talk about this, itll scare people", "It's your fault so I wouldnt tell anyone if I were you" etc etc

I'll tell people what I want to tell people. If it goes wrong then it goes wrong but im not gonna keep my mouth shut about something just because someone else tells me to, or thinks I should

[willowschild.livejournal.com]

Wow, for a "disorder" that doesn't exist, MPD is one of the most documented areas I've ever encountered. And if it doesn't exist, why was it reclassified as Dissosiative Identity Disorder a few years ago? Some people are really ignorant of the world around them. I've many multiple friends and most are fully aware of their systems. I've also been able to recognize each personality separately, from outside the system. Does that make me crazy for being able to see this change?

[angel530.livejournal.com]

Does that make me crazy for being able to see this change?

If it makes you crazy it makes half our friends that know crazy!!

Her last reply to us is the one that really got to us... Waiting for her next response!

May as well give you all the link...

[silence-rising.livejournal.com]

Wasnt because weve had shit for asking a similar question before but Ill deal with that later if and when it happens

For those of you that want to follow this conv its here:

http://p103.ezboard.com/fthewitchboardfrm22.showMessage?topicID=7.topic

Youll need an EZaccount though if you want to post

Re: May as well give you all the link...

[kangetsuhime.livejournal.com]

... Ouch.

'we' only has a debilitating effect one one's social life, if one's social life consists primarily of closed minded not-real-friends :P Even the people from before my time have managed to accept that we are as we are, even if they find it hard to accept.

the implication that by admitting you're multiple you're dooming yourself to a life alone is mind boggling. That's like saying she won't have a social life for admitting she's pagan. I mean come *on*.

[saturniakitty.livejournal.com]

*Sigh* Typical. We've run into people like on message boards before (and other areas of LJ)

[our-dry-cellar.livejournal.com]

Well, if that isn't a big huge chunk of patronizing bullshit.

[vinik.livejournal.com]

I just read the thread and wow, would that ever be frustrating. I'm glad people are giving you some alternative boards to visit.

And I love how the board lackey was all THE LEADER KNOWS ALL SO SHUT UP YOUZ GUYS!"

Because everybody knows that people seen as leaders in the Pagan community are actually on a higher level of consciousness than the rest of us. They know all and have no human flaws. And you know that Paganism is the only branch of faith that has a 100% pure and perfect clergy that never abuses their power.

Oh wait, that's right. The only people to share this kind of genuine authority are psychiatrists. Because they never screw up either. Ever.

-Morgan and David, fighting over the keyboard

[fractured-girl.livejournal.com]

Because one of the goals of such treatment is to help you to realize that there are not really 10 personalities within you but one that for some reason has fragmented.
what? Trying to say there is something wrong with it? What is wrong with fragmenting? At times it is for the best. Agreed? Why do they consider it a goal to kill the others off one by one? Who determines who is more important, and who should survive? I would NEVER talk to a psychiatrist about myself. I like things the way they are and a psychiatrist would try to fix it, but there is no need to put her back together again, things are fine the way they are. I see plenty here who function well who probably wouldn't otherwise.