It's done.

[stealthdragon.livejournal.com]

We're 'out' to a big chunk of our circle of friends. On the whole, they've been supportive. The only one who's outright stated that they've got a problem with it is our boyfriend.

I've been discussing it with him, and we seem to agree on just about everything (that "I" 'hear' several internal 'voices', each of us being primarily resident in different brain-regions, etc.) except that he thinks we're "really" top-level unified, and we don't. Specifically, his opinion is that some mythical "I" has personified different brain-regions until they're experienced as not-me. *sigh*

Sometimes the people we love are the most difficult of all.

Comments

[ksol1460.livejournal.com]

We've had that experience, with someone who was otherwise very understanding and supportive. We could not find the words to explain to him that it was not like that. It was his way of understanding it, I think, mapping it onto a reality that made sense to him.

But the majority of your friends have welcomed all of you, and that is beautiful.

[sethrenn.livejournal.com]

People who love you often don't like the feeling that they may not have known you as intimately as they thought they did. Some of them perceive it as a threat, if their child or sibling or SO or whatever, whom they thought they "knew better than anyone," could have slipped this secret under their radar.

So denial is the first step for a lot of them-- trying to wrangle it into a perspective where it becomes merely a phase or a self-exploration technique or confusion.

Unfortunately, even if this is psychologically easier on them, it makes it a hell of a lot harder on you.

I'm glad your other friends seem to be all right with it, though.

[allusionist.livejournal.com]

It's also possible that he wants to rationalize it that way so it's not "well, there's this person I love but she shares a body with other people who aren't her" as much as it is "there's someone I love but she compartmentalizes herself into seperate personalities - it's all eally her though."

How do the different members in your system view him? If it's all consistent, this may simply reinforce that beleief. If they disagree, it might make it too scary to accept the truth and reinforce it indoirectly as well.

Personally, I think the best approach is the direct "no, that's not how it works" approach. Then again, I tend to sabotage my own relationships, so I wouldn't suggest ever listening to advice that I give - a good chunk of it may be right, but JUST enough is horribly wrong to make it not worth it ^^;;;

[catskillmarina.livejournal.com]

Some of our loved ones went through a mourning process when they found we were multiple.

...Of course we became aware of our multiplicity when the default front collapsed and seemed
to dissapear, so they did have something to mourn.

Most have come to love all of us, but they do admitt to missing the old default...

[rookguard.livejournal.com]

The issue raised is actually one we've agonized a great deal over. We settled it, deciding that our inability to integrate indicated a schism to deep to be a construction, and given our (or my, at least) deep and honest desire to see it end, it makes much more sense that we are indeed a "we" and not an "I".

To put the issue simply, it is not the "We" that is the construction of the "I", but the "I" that exists for the convenience of the "We".