(no subject)

[mstakenforstars.livejournal.com]

Hello- I am looking for some advice. One of my best friends was recentley diagnosed with MPD. I didn't know anything about it, and honestly didn't even believe her until I saw it happen one night at my house. She told me she had been raped and molested. It's a long story, but she has depression, an eating disorder, and has tried to commit suicide twice within the past year. She has been out of the hospital for about three weeks, after being in and out since November. I saw her last night, and she doesn't seem like her usual bubbly self.

But ever since she had a breakdown, I don't know how to act around her. I am afraid I will upset her somehow and the multiple personalities will come out. To be honest, it really scares me and I don't know how to handle it, but I want to be a good friend.

How do I support her and try to act normal? I don't want her to think I am freaked out, I want to be supportive. I wish I could give her advice, as in I don't think living with her parents is helping her, but it's not my place. Any advice? Thank you.

Comments

[kyouketsusha.livejournal.com]

Honestly, you should be worrying about your friend's health, her depression and suicidal tendencies, not her multipleness. :/ Just act like you've always acted. She's still the same person.

And tell her how you feel. You don't want her to think you're freaked out, but you ARE freaked out. Be supportive by talking to her about it, and LISTENING to her about it, instead of being scared of her now.

[catskillmarina.livejournal.com]

Mostly having other people (what you call personalities) come out is good and healthy.
Everyone in the system needs to learn to get along somehow.

Get to know the new friends you did not know you had made. ;-)

--- April (Four Moon)

[saturniakitty.livejournal.com]

Just act normal around her, and try not to act differently when the other people are out (they could perceive it as insulting) Remember that as a good friend you should support all of them, and not just the person you already know. From what you've said there's a good chance that all of them have issues that need to be worked out, and they probably never get an opportunity to talk to people about what they're going through.

[gryphons.livejournal.com]

*nods* agrees with what has been said* be yourself, and be truthful with her.. don't "act" normal.. get to know her and the others of her household.. feel free to message us if you have questions about our experiences.. or you can friend our journal too..

*nods* yeah we describe our life as a really big dorm where you're always around your dormmates..

[ksol1460.livejournal.com]

Did she have an actual breakdown, or did you just see a switch from one person to another?

In most of the systems we know, including ours, people don't just "come out" when something upsetting happens. People come and go all the time. It's routine. Like April said, get to know them as individuals.

http://www.astraeasweb.net/plural/faq.shtml You might find a few of your questions answered here and you can write to us and ask.

[shandra.livejournal.com]

I agree with a lot of what's been said. She does have problems, but the problems are likely not the other people (they may be having problems too).

You probably have met at least some of the other people; you just didn't know it. Now you have the chance to meet them individually too which could be kind of cool. :)

[lydiabutterfly.livejournal.com]

be nice to her and make friends with the others dont be mad at them if there diffrent than her.

Lydia

A suggested starting point

[stealthdragon.livejournal.com]

If you've read any books about multiplicity, seen it on TV, or spoken with a shrink about it, there's an excellent chance that you're misinformed.

If you've read any websites by multiples, which describe in detail how their internal household (or other operating environment) works, there's a good chance that your friends' system will work differently, although not necessarily drastically so. It's really a very individual thing.

As you interact with your friend and her brainmates, it will be helpful to both of you if you do your best to refrain from making assumptions.

Best of luck to everyone involved,
- Us