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multiplicity_archives05:15 am: Empowerment in the Present.
So much of our individual and combined energy has been used to maintain our concealment. In early life, this was essential and served us well, except when the system malfunctioned, which happened frequently, because our power was so often taken from us by abusers. That is no longer pertinent to our present life. It is hard to shed the cloak of secrecy, but perhaps we have outgrown the need for it. Perhaps our hidden identities have outlasted their usefulness and no longer serve us. We tried to adhere to the medical conception by merging into one being, believing that was the only way to mental health. But, that is their model, not ours, which appears to most outsiders as resistance on our part, giving us an unhealthy label. It's hard to describe, this integration as originally perceived; but it feels oppressive and compulsory, even when we tried to comply with the expectation and comform to the accepted standard. Fortunately, our therapist did not restrict our healing process or force this outcome upon us.
However, I was reminded of the prevalent beliefs on this topic, when a close friend visiting from Florida, inquired whether we were all integrated yet. It's like cramming us all into the same space. We know we have to share the same body, which was and still is a challenge at times, but losing our uniqueness because the medical community states that we must do so as the only means of achieving wholeness, the cure for the disorder they came up with, with a specific set of criteria and rules.
I am much more understanding and less bitter toward this perspective, perhaps because I, Nan, am a therapist myself, but we as a system reject the mental illness, disorder theory and framework, in favor of the healthy, creative survival framework as the purpose of our existence. There is no doubt that within us there was considerable disorder, disfunction, chaos and perpetual conflict. There were destructive elements to recognize and overcome. But this is true to a greater or lesser extent, for everyone, whether one self or many, single or multiple. We are now ready and willing to step beyond our inner world, and be open to experiencing life as our own conscious revelation. We are choosing to unfold, rather than to fold up like an accordion, all smushed together. The value of an accordion is in its ability to move and make music. We each have our own legacy, which we don't need to keep Nan from knowing. We don't find it necessary to dissociate in order to express ourselves or to be real, apart from Nan entirely. Now, we can have diversity and harmony without catastrophe.
Current Mood: awake
Current Music: Listen. Do You Want To Know A Secret.
So much of our individual and combined energy has been used to maintain our concealment. In early life, this was essential and served us well, except when the system malfunctioned, which happened frequently, because our power was so often taken from us by abusers. That is no longer pertinent to our present life. It is hard to shed the cloak of secrecy, but perhaps we have outgrown the need for it. Perhaps our hidden identities have outlasted their usefulness and no longer serve us. We tried to adhere to the medical conception by merging into one being, believing that was the only way to mental health. But, that is their model, not ours, which appears to most outsiders as resistance on our part, giving us an unhealthy label. It's hard to describe, this integration as originally perceived; but it feels oppressive and compulsory, even when we tried to comply with the expectation and comform to the accepted standard. Fortunately, our therapist did not restrict our healing process or force this outcome upon us.
However, I was reminded of the prevalent beliefs on this topic, when a close friend visiting from Florida, inquired whether we were all integrated yet. It's like cramming us all into the same space. We know we have to share the same body, which was and still is a challenge at times, but losing our uniqueness because the medical community states that we must do so as the only means of achieving wholeness, the cure for the disorder they came up with, with a specific set of criteria and rules.
I am much more understanding and less bitter toward this perspective, perhaps because I, Nan, am a therapist myself, but we as a system reject the mental illness, disorder theory and framework, in favor of the healthy, creative survival framework as the purpose of our existence. There is no doubt that within us there was considerable disorder, disfunction, chaos and perpetual conflict. There were destructive elements to recognize and overcome. But this is true to a greater or lesser extent, for everyone, whether one self or many, single or multiple. We are now ready and willing to step beyond our inner world, and be open to experiencing life as our own conscious revelation. We are choosing to unfold, rather than to fold up like an accordion, all smushed together. The value of an accordion is in its ability to move and make music. We each have our own legacy, which we don't need to keep Nan from knowing. We don't find it necessary to dissociate in order to express ourselves or to be real, apart from Nan entirely. Now, we can have diversity and harmony without catastrophe.
Current Mood: awake
Current Music: Listen. Do You Want To Know A Secret.
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Date: 2005-11-27 12:43 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-11-27 01:30 am (UTC)This is all very understndable to me in some strange way. You have touched I think my very own soul. After recently going through a very much forced integration with a threapist we all had trusted so much and everything went as wrong as it possibly could. I dont know how you are so gentle with your selves.And the world around you rselves. I tend to mad at the choces were left wtih regarding the medical and mental models. I have found nothing but anger to greet me,but you seem to have found understanding of just where you belong and why. That is a good quaility to have. Tiea would love your music selection along with
Jade there severe Romantics at heart . I liked this article you should post more. Thx Elaine& The bratz Pac
Thanks for posting this.
Thnx Elane
Thanks ever so much for your kind words of acceptance.
Date: 2005-11-27 03:13 am (UTC)We read all of your posts and the other entries here, because we belong to this community. Never have we felt as accepted as we have since joining.
And, when we didn't know anyone who is plural, much less interact with them, we found it extremely lonely, in spite of Nan's many friends in life.
We appreciate this comment and much of what you post we have found helpful and useful.
Re: Thanks ever so much for your kind words of acceptance.
Date: 2005-11-27 05:44 am (UTC)Serinna says Hi but she is sleepy, so cause Tiea has Choir and church tomorrow we wont stay up to late + The kids get whiney and then I have to watch them at Church
So its best to snuggle with them in bed and twidle my thumbs till they pass out and the get back on the computer . Stay Cool Thnx Elaine
Thank you.
Date: 2005-12-09 02:24 am (UTC)It is good to know that others may find meaning in what we have written.