Hi

[ozzysarchangel.livejournal.com]

Hello all,
asically here because I am sooooo confused by my ability to dissociate. This is because I do not believe that I have alters and I don't dissociate often. In fact, I mostly dissociate when on drugs. I have hardly dissociated under completely normal circumstances. This leads me to believe that it is a chemical thing and not a biologial or PTSD. In either case, I don't know how or why I feel that I am NOT in myself or why everything seems like a ghost and a mirror of itself. At any rate, its very scary to me and I wonder if anyone else dissociates under similar circumstances.
Thx

Comments

[etana.livejournal.com]

1. Stop doing mind altering drugs. That might help, peaches...

2. Everyone dissociates to some degree, sometimes something as liminal as "street hypnosis" where you get from point A to point B on the highway without realizing you did it because it's so manual/auto-pilot.

3. Stop doing mind altering drugs. That might help, peaches.

4. Go see a shrink. If you feel the need to do mind altering drugs often enough that even sober-time feels wasted, you probably have underlying issues that need dealt with - like an inability to cope with reality and a heavy dependance on substance abuse. That's not an issue for this community...although some of us have that issue, sure...

5. It's 7am. Go back to bed. OR drink some strong coffee.

letting ;lose today

[jadedmosaic.livejournal.com]

Well I am not with the JADEDONE but I am from the Mosaic gang my name just happens to be jade also. Tiea is real depressed by all the commments she got last night she poured our hearts out first time public on a bad night we are functional plurals but anniversery of Mothers death brought on sadness when we realized what caused her to die and bashing fronters body blows all night and internal conflict and haunting jept us up and to end our lovely evening after being clean for 30 years and no meds but for Lupus we are going to drink all the wine we can get and booze at family Reunion cause no matter how functional we are and thrive in the world and pay taxes they sit waiting for us to give them a freak show and we havent ever we've maintained but Tiea is so like I dont give a shit I think were comming out to entire extended family today at Reunion and getting blasted before we do it I worry about the kids though getting too much to drink but Tiea clearly wants to self medicate after the night we had the mistakes we made posting and the comments we got it all seems there is no where we fit we thought it was here so salute to bravery and comming out to extended family we'll all be there is Tiea's plan not just observing . talking Playing Bocchi eating drinking roasting marsmellows playing cars and so forth Peace God Speed The Mosaic Gang Alchol tends to break down are system ITS TIME

Re: letting ;lose today

[etana.livejournal.com]

So all of a sudden you are a complete multiple system, whereas the post was based on the assumption that mind-altering drugs may induce dissociative symptoms?

Man if this post is for real that's fine, but I'm getting offended at the seemingly text-book wierdness I'm readin' here. As a former dealer and such and such, this shit ain't cool.

If you're for real, then whatever. But if this is some creepy joke by a pothead with time on hand, then it ain't cool.

And it ain't 'preciated. For real.

Jz

(like that? yeah, I made it up. I'm tired of being called "J' for real - I like Jz, but not like the rapper. Naw.)

Re: letting ;lose today

[appadil.livejournal.com]

Er, the impression I have is that Jadedmosaic et al are completely unrelated to the original poster, aside from the "Jade" in the name. They're the ones who posted the recent entries in bright color and felt attacked when people asked them to lj-cut. I have no idea how their response was supposed to be related to Ozzysarchangel's post, though- there may be a connection, but I'm having a hard time seeing it.

Re: letting ;lose today

[etana.livejournal.com]

I'm confused and annoyed. I didn't even look at this person's posts so I have no idea why I get the brunt of some rant or wierd rave. I didn't ask about this persons' personal life and how are they related to the OP?

I thought this person was the OP under a diff. name. Either way this is ANNOYING.

Re: letting ;lose today

[appadil.livejournal.com]

They aren't related. The just chose to make a seemingly irrelevant comment.... It doesn't seem to be on purpose exactly, it's just.. I don't think they really know how to use LJ or proper netiquette or anything, and they seem to not want to listen to constructive criticism.

Re: letting ;lose today

[pengke.livejournal.com]

It had nothing to do with you. They've been making long random posts in comments. You just happened to be the only comment for them to hit reply to.

Re: letting ;lose today

[revive-me-again.livejournal.com]

i think the comment wasn't the person who posted.

*KYLIE*

Re: letting ;lose today

[ozzysarchangel.livejournal.com]

No, that post was not made by me. I carry my own mental illness, I wouldn't make fun of anyone else's. We just seem to have a name in common.

Re: letting ;lose today

[etana.livejournal.com]

yeah I realize that now. But why did you pick me to respond to in regards to a post you made earlier that I never responded to? That's wierd and unnappreciated, I don't want to be nobody's scapegoat!

(still purplesockz, just changed our lj name is all)

Re: letting ;lose today

[ozzysarchangel.livejournal.com]

sorry, I'm so confused. I don't know whats goin on or who to respond to anymore.

Re: letting ;lose today

[etana.livejournal.com]

never mind. YOU"RE the OP.

This is ridiculous. HELP?!?!

[emploding.livejournal.com]

Yeh, the DSM definition of DID specifically says all symptoms must not be the result of drug use. Depending on the drug, tis likely not even dissociation, merely an effect of the substance.

[boi-grrl-wonder.livejournal.com]

man, let'em know that anything harder than that can waste your brain stem and stuff. If the body isn't young and flexible it probably ain't a good idea to go and take anything other than alcohol or pot. I've seen some crazy messed up body reactions when folks who've lived a while do hard time.

that's all I'm sayin. I have a list for people here too, and I'm very watchful about the drugs they take. Too much craziness in the purplesockz system (ha yeah this is the other lj name we use because purplesockz is stupid)...gotta have a plan.

For real. All I'm sayin.

Jz

[boi-grrl-wonder.livejournal.com]

haha leash.

[sethrenn.livejournal.com]

You can actually eat pot if you don't like to smoke it. You can put it in all kinds of things, although it'll give everything a very distinctive pot flavour. *^_^*

[sethrenn.livejournal.com]

Have you tried it in spaghetti sauce? You can actually put it in anything where any kind of cooking oil is an ingredient-- just fry it in the oil before mixing it in.

[ozzysarchangel.livejournal.com]

Have you ever made pot tea? I heard you can do that too but I never tried it.

[ksol1460.livejournal.com]

it isn't very good

[kasiya-system.livejournal.com]

Well, I would stop taking the drugs for awhile and see if that is the cause.

Jenilee

[vinik.livejournal.com]

I have a friend who once told me she 'switches' when she's high, but has no other indication that she's plural. For her, she now thinks it is a temporary chemical thing and not Multiple. And I'm wondering about your use of the word 'dissociate' and what you define it as. Is that your word for what happens when you switch?

I'd stop with the drugs for a while and try other ways to reach out to the others to see if they exist, like making a journal available for their use (make sure there's a notice on it or around it saying it's ok). I'm sure there are other suggestions here too on how to reach out. If nothing happens for a long, long time, it's probably just the drugs.

[ozzysarchangel.livejournal.com]

Okay this is what I mean when I say "dissociate" Its like I'm having an outer body experience. Things don't seem real. I don't seem real. Its almost as if I'm watching everything from somewhere else. Its to the point that it actually scares me because I have no control of this. Its not as if I can just snap myself back. I stay this way for a substantial amount of time.
I do not take any hardcore hallucinogens. I don't do acid or mushrooms or pills. It only seems to happen when I smoke pot. I guess it is a feeling of "switching" like what your friend calls it. The thing is, I have a shrink. My diagnosis as far as I know is "bipolar disorder II, borderline personality disorder (which I know can carry dissociative symptoms, and substance abuse).
I have experienced these symptoms on rare occassions without the drugs. But because it happens so much more when I smoke pot, I really don't know what to make of anything.

[stealthdragon.livejournal.com]

You have no control over feeling detached from your body, or you have no control over what your body is doing? (Or both?)

[ozzysarchangel.livejournal.com]

both =( I was looking at this site ---> http://www.nwrain.net/~refocus/trance.html , and where it says definitions, I pretty much feel like all that stuff

[sethrenn.livejournal.com]

A feeling of "unreality" can be one of the effects of pot, or of any hallucinogen, really. My suggestion is that, if it scares you that much, you probably shouldn't smoke pot, or find another drug which doesn't have that effect on you.

[thehumangame.livejournal.com]

I was curious about this a year ago, and asked in a couple of psychedelic communities. Apparently it is decently common for people to experience transient multiple selves while tripping, but very rare for it to persist afterwards.

[sethrenn.livejournal.com]

In fact, I mostly dissociate when on drugs. I have hardly dissociated under completely normal circumstances.

There is a class of drugs which are specifically referred to as 'dissociatives,' because they have the effect to which you refer. Some prescription tranquilizers (Valium, Xanax, etc) and anti-convulsants have a similar effect. Basically, if you take them, you can expect to experience feelings of derealisation, depersonalisation, disconnection from your body, etc. It doesn't sound like what you're describing is necessarily connected to multiplicity. (We're multiple but don't dissociate under normal circumstances.)

[changelyng14.livejournal.com]

i don't know if its conclusive that the OP is NOT multiple. i can share something about us, as well as a member of a system i know.

when we were first learning to face, we could switch aLOT easier if we were buzzed (lightly drunk). we blamed it on inhibitions.

a person i knew confessed that during their systems 'in the closet' era. they hid behind their 'face person' (who was unaware of them) but they often would switch when drunk, because a) it was fun times, and b) its socially acceptable to act differently when drunk, and therefore changes in their behavior would be passed off, less risk of them being caught, and the blacking out was blamed on alcohol.

the OP has said WAY too little about ?her? experience for me to have an opinion about what ?shes? going through though. but it *could* be a description of being bumped, but it also sounds alot like just being stoned. what kinda drugs, anyways?

g'luck

candy

[ozzysarchangel.livejournal.com]

It doesn't make any sense to me that I should feel like that because I only smoke pot. Although this has been happening for years when I smoke. I commented all about it to someone else. Read if you like =)

[stealthdragon.livejournal.com]

In fact, I mostly dissociate when on drugs. I have hardly dissociated under completely normal circumstances. ... At any rate, its very scary to me and I wonder if anyone else dissociates under similar circumstances.

Now, we get stuff like this when we're stone cold sober. The best possible thing you can do about it is relax, especially if you're also high. (Considering that it was around eight hours ago when you posted, I'm guessing that you won't be by the time you read this, but you never can tell.) Maybe look out the window. Think how funny - or just plain cool - it is that the people walking by seem like particularly mobile wax statues. After all, they're not going to stay that way.
You've obviously found it an unpleasant enough experience to post about here, so I'd suggest staying off of the drugs. (At least the ones that cause such an experience.) If you have trouble with that, A) get help, or B) get used to it.

As to whether you're multiple, only you can tell us that. :)