(no subject)

[hexpiritus.livejournal.com]

My girlfriend is a multiple-- so am I, but that's a different situation entirely and one that I haven't come here to discuss... yet. (Heh.)

She's rather shy sometimes, and I'm a regular lurker on this community, so I was hoping I could post this question here. This summer, the beings inside her mind (collectively called the Pentacle) attempted integration. Currently, we have reason to believe that the attempt has failed. This integration was not prompted by any therapist but was a conclusion that was reached by a majority of them. I say majority because apparently one of the Pentacle was not consulted as to her opinion, the decision was foisted on her by the other four, and the integration was therefore more forced than harmonized. It took this long to figure out because their internal communication isn't exactly... the best. The Host is human, and the other four are Otherkin: a demon, a fae, a wolf, and a phoenix. Because of this, they all have difficulty understanding each other. The demoness particularly seems to create conflict and misunderstanding within the Pentacle, and was the being who had been forced by the other four.

I myself am neutral on the integration controversy, since we can integrate at will for short periods of time when a situation calls for it. However, most of the Pentacle believe that integration is their ultimate longterm goal. I've suggested that they need to work on communication, but with their different backgrounds, goals, and not to mention species divide, they're finding this kind of difficult. We've been attempting to mediate between some of them, as some of us get along with some of them. It's our opinion that they need to concentrate on opening a channel of communication, or appoint one being in the Pentacle to understand and mediate between the rest so that the decisions won't be a matter of force, but a matter of general accord.

Do any of you have any other suggestions, please? I'm only experienced in dealing with my own internal problems, and this is the first time I've ever dated another out multiple.

Thank you for reading.

Comments

[hexpiritus.livejournal.com]

I suppose, technically, it's not my question to ask, since I'm not the one experiencing the problem. I could have lied and said I was the one undergoing the turmoil, or forced her to post. However, she isn't quite ready to "out" her livejournal for this issue, and has only started using it with a very specific friends only filter to dicuss it with close friends and loved ones. She has requested that I use my own knowledge and resources to garner suggestions, but I find that she's already getting the hang of internally communicating more, and that she only wished for some mediation from me because it not only helped her beings talk to each other, but talk to my own.

If there is something amiss with her not wanting to be part of this community or a mailing list yet, and using myself as a medium to seek suggestions, I wasn't aware of it at the time I made this post. If the different beings come out to individually discuss it with others, does it make a difference whether they are multiples or not, or whether they're people she trusts? Granted, there is validity in asking impartial advice from strangers who don't have the emotional bias that those close to you would have, but I don't see how that's enough to negate the right of her getting me as a proxy to seek suggestions for her issues.

Thanks for your comments.
-Rhees & Erin of the Hex

[shandra.livejournal.com]

Because it's her problem, and if you're communicating for them, that's sort of the same problem they're having but - whatever. Your life, your relationship. :)

[hexpiritus.livejournal.com]

Small steps, small steps. I'll eventually get her on here, but on her own time. First she starts internally, then she can go externally.

[dark-blade.livejournal.com]

Makes sense :)