Surprising change in system

[chezames.livejournal.com]

(cross-posted on chezames and plural_living)

Hi everyone. We have a situation we’d like some feedback on from other plurals. A week or so ago, the “original host” of this body, Toni, re-emmerged. We had thought she had died 24 years ago, and at that time another member, Cristie, began to front most of the time and kind of took over her life. It was really hard for Cristie to try to pretend to be Toni, because she had never been around, or been conscious, before this, and didn’t have Toni’s memories. Anyway, for a few days after Toni showed herself to us again, she and Cristie hung out a lot together, mostly away from the rest of the system. But then we stopped “hearing from” Cristie and we can no longer sense her. Toni is “Toni” and also has Cristie’s memories and thoughts and feelings. I know it sounds like both are there, but we can not sense Cristie’s presence in any way, only Toni. I’m not sure if this is making sense but I’m trying my best to explain.

It’s our belief now that Cristie was a split of Toni, in other words she was Toni but without the tramatic memories, and there for a different person. It is seeming to us that Toni and Cristie have integrated (*gasp*). We do not support integration, I want to make that clear. But this wasn’t a conscious decision nor forced. It just seems to have happened naturally – as if Toni and Cristie were 2 halves of the same “person” and now that they are both back they talked and decided to come together and live as one.

Ok, so this is how it seems to us. I was just wondering if anyone else has gone through this. And if any plurals have opinions about this, they would be appreciated, not matter what they were.



~ Lynn

Comments

[sexylittleone.livejournal.com]

We have had this happen twice. Shu & El merged many years ago. Then 2 others did as well when the body was about 15.

My cores submissive has alters that merge & return all the time lately ... has for a while. Causes quite a bit of chaos in her system. :(

We don't support integration either. sometimes tho it happens.

Adriana

[theghostwalkers.livejournal.com]

We have had a similar experience: There was One within, whom was not quite like Us but was a strong presence in the body, who merged with the (boy) several years ago. At least I am of the opinion that they merged, in their way, since the One disappeared & We could no longer sense His presence.

[ksol1460.livejournal.com]

Spontaneous merging is natural to some systems, and later on they might spontaneously differentiate again.

[judiff]

sometimes diffenrt ones of us kind of blkur together for a bit - usually me and dwoucke or ludy and gwyny. But that's very temoray. So i can't say much about your experence but i think natural merging is a very diffenrent thing to forced integration - it might be like a totaly natural development/evolution for your system. And if it is (which obviulsy we don't know/can't have an opinion on) then it would be like a waste of time trying to fight it just becos it looks a bit like integration and if it isn't then i guess that Cristie and Toni will unmerge over time.

[forever-alone.livejournal.com]

My situation is similar to this. 2 years ago the other girl (our former frontrunner) passed away and all of her experiences, memories and emotions were integrated into me and I became the main frontrunner in her place. This happened without my knowledge, and when I found out what took place I was, to say the least, more than a little shocked. Most if not all of us are against integration, so for something like this to take place was very peculiar for our system.

[amusedinsanity.livejournal.com]

I'm new, but I know this and that

With ourselves, spontanious merging has happened a few times, as well as spontantious splitting or re-splitting. For example two indeviduals taking seperate traumatic memories were split off of Onyx. Later Onyx located them both, and brought them together (For comfort, in her way) After spending some time together, Unclean and Filthee merged and became Zoe who has since become a quiet member of our core group.

We ourselves are against integration, but we find this kind of spontanious merging to be a perfectly natural thing. If it's right for the indeviduals in question, there is no harm in it, and often for those indeviduals it's healing and helpful to them. It's thier choice, they are after all their own persons.

[chaostiny.livejournal.com]

we have gone through almost similar integrations and for our system, when that happens it is a good thing. Many times it helps to complete memories and help both parts deal with something, and also, we all tend to feel a bit less claustophobic each time it happens. Our personal theory is this: When the mind is ready great things can happen. When parts merge together spontaneously, they were meant to be together. They have healed enough to deal with the things they hold. For us, its an excellent healing experience... we celebrate each one as a step, we are not purposely integrating. But when it happens we know we are doing well.
Hope this helps...
alex