Starting Therapy (Again)

[susanacts.livejournal.com]

On September 4th, I see my new therapist and then the psychiatrist right after her. It's going to be quite a day. I've been told by the psychiatrist that I shouldn't bring up DID, which is fine with me. I can discuss the issues at hand, and wait on the DID for later. We've been busy here anyway. My family added one new member-a new niece. It's been fun so far. Children like I was, are innocent, no matter what happens. Two of my alters are children too. After looking at many DID books, watching DVDs on the topic, and living with it, I have learned how to keep my internal family at bay while around external family. It's difficult sometimes, but my alters have never met my external family, 3 close friends, or professionals for that matter.

I'm just as worried about letting them "speak" as the psychiatrist is. But I will eventually go nuts and they'll come out here. A few already have in my entries, and I don't know if I should apologize or not. The two worlds collide, and things run amok. Part of me doesn't want to apologize. This is just the way things are.

Any comments? Suggestions? It hurts to keep "hiding" like this. It's a trust issue too...can we really count on others outside to really understand and help us on the healing journey? We get rid of people who hate us. We avoid them at all costs. But those who love us need to know that it's okay for us to "come out." We won't hurt loved ones.

I'm off to see the new baby and my family now, so I'll post again soon.

Comments

[susanacts.livejournal.com]

Thanks for the group link. It said that the group did_support isn't registered though. I'll do my best with posts...and appreciate your input. If this group gets off the ground, I won't mind checking them out either way. Take care!

[person-salad.livejournal.com]

I fixed it sorry. I got it wrong the first time.

DID Community

[susanacts.livejournal.com]

I got it..thanks!

[person-salad.livejournal.com]

You might want to check out didsupport. It sounds like your questions might be more appropriate for that group than here since here isn't a discussion forum.

Question:

[spookshow-girl.livejournal.com]

What's up with you saying this isn't a discussion forum? That's exactly what this is.

And what about this isn't geared to plenty of threads that have gone on here in the past?

It's starting to seem like you're more interested in recruiting people for that group than actually discussing anything here. There's nothing wrong with people being parts of both, it just seems that you're damn quick to tell people that here isn't the place to talk about things.

Since I know you're not a mod here, and I know that this place is supposed to be an open forum to discuss different views, I'm wondering where you get off saying otherwise?

It's not a support forum. There's a difference.

--Me

Re: Question:

[person-salad.livejournal.com]

The main thing Kassie was trying to say in her post to the OP is that didsupport might be a better place because it's pro-integration. The main one, Kassi, tried to post here before and Was told (http://community.livejournal.com/multiplicity/714365.html) many times (http://community.livejournal.com/multiplicity/713366.html) Not to discuss things here (http://community.livejournal.com/multiplicity/712975.html). So, in short, that's why we redirected the OP to didsupport. I think Sylvia was worried that the OP might get jumped on for not being pro-integration. - Katherine of the salad system

Sorry. If it bothers you so much, I'll stop. - Karen of the salad system

I'm not a mod there or here so I have no reason to post about either community on either side of the place? I don't get it. - Sylvia.

Re: Question:

[person-salad.livejournal.com]

You know what we got confused. We thought that this wasn't a discussion forum, but after looking back through those posts, we realize that we meant this isn't a support forum instead of discussion. Our bad. Sorry.

[rhymer-713.livejournal.com]

But seriously why not let them out? I mean, just curious. We've all been in control part of the time. It's not all "One person and then their alters stuck waaaaay back somewhere." Let them out, let them learn to experience things, and that way if anything happens and you're forced to let go of front they can continue to live the external life while you're away. For us it'd get tiring being in front all the time.
Alissa

[padawanagain.livejournal.com]

I just gotta say that once being one of the 'alters' forced to be quiet really sucked. Even if you are headed towards integration, they're still with you and to be ignored and ashamed of... it just really sucks.

~A

A suggestion?

[worldnamer.livejournal.com]

A few already have in my entries, and I don't know if I should apologize or not.

Well, I can't make any suggestions about who your alters should speak to in the real world, but I think it's fine if they post here. It may take off some of the stress.

[ksol1460.livejournal.com]

Let me get this straight. Why is your shrink worried about letting them talk? Is it because he thinks they will get the idea they're real? I've got news for him. Doesn't he know that even where it really is a disorder, it takes tons of pressure off if they can communicate? I wouldn't call that going nuts.

[tatteredscars.livejournal.com]

yeah, i didn't like that either. if he's a doctor, then there should be nothing that he's uncomfortable with. i'm afraid for you working with him. i'm afraid that he won't understand and then fill your head with bs.

tread carefully, dear.
alison

[ksol1460.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I know. I thought it would make me nuts, too. Instead, it set me free.

Even if the times and places have to be chosen carefully (we're not out in most of our offline life, or to most of our family), or if online is the only place they can express themselves, it sounds like it would be better for all of you if you didn't keep such a tight rein on them.

Hey there

[spookshow-girl.livejournal.com]

I haven't seen anything any of you posted that would be offensive. If that's happened and I missed it, it's own issue to resolve.

There's nothing wrong with "the others" posting to this community. In fact, for some in this community, that particular concept isn't even an issue. In my case it isn't. It may be an issue for you, and that's fine, but my advice is to not let it get you anxious over who is posting here. It's not likely that them posting, in and of itself, is going to be a reason for people to look at you in a negative light. If some people do, it's their problem.

As for your situation with your therapist and psych, I'm not sure what to advise, for various technical reasons. I'd need a lot more information to give advice, and even then, I can't say whether or not my advice would be any good.

Now, out of curiousity, what do you define as "going nuts"? Do you think they'll be disruptive? If so, you might want to try setting some ground rules, if you can.

--Me