hay ya'll, i'm jakie

[amyystar63.livejournal.com]

hay ya'll.  i'm jakie.  um. some of you know me us as Amy.  Amy has this stupid rule that when we're in public we all have to go by the same name.  So when we were getting drunk tonight everyone was calling me "amy" and i had to pretend it didn't bother me.  We hate not being called by our names.  Can't people tell the difference? We're so NOT ALIKE!  i'm the fucking wild one...lovin' it all the way.  Nice to meet ya'all.  I found this site, or i guess you all call it a community in Amy's email box....some of you commented on her saying she was a multiple.  i guess that's what she calls all of us.  I don't care what you call us as long as you call us by the right name, damn it!  our best friend (those of us who have met her) is really careful to make sure she knows who she's talking to so she uses our names...you can bet that confuses a lot of people around us!  there's only a few people we can go by our real names with.  We sign our names at the end of our emails, a lot of times if there's more than one in our system present we sign "Us" or the main person and "others", instead of explaining the whole damn thing.  It's much easier just to say that. And our therapist speaks to us and calls us by our names.  It's kind of annoying..."who are you?"  Can't you fucking tell? We have to be kind of patient with the guy.  It's frustrating have to remeet people all the time.  When someone new comes out, like someone whose just been hanging out inside somewhere and hasn't seen anyone, just heard the commotion, they don't know faces so they don't know who people are.  So like my father (who calls us all "characters"- how fucking insulting...we're humans we have fucking feelings thank you very much), some days we don't know who he is...he's just some strange man we live with.  Usually someone explains it to me or i call my therapist and he tells us who the guy is.  Most of them have met our best friend since she's so understanding of the multiplicity- if you can call us that- it's kind of complicated with all of us, so we call her too and she'll tell us who everyone is if we don't know.  Needless to say she gets a lot of phone calls.

Sometimes even yvette (2 years old) came front and center.  She came while Amy was driving.  She was really stressed and crying and everything and pop- there she came.  we girls tried to stop her, but the guys didn't want her to stick with us in the back, so she started to drive.  Yeah, a two year old driving is not a good thing.  She almost kileld Amy...and ultimatly us- although i'm not sure how that works?!?!  Amy's a schizo- and she has this friend named Jackson...well he's my friend too (Jakie, just incase you haven't been following me, i can be a little confusing at times)- the others don't know him very well, just me, yvette, Amy, Amiee and a few others.  The main ones know him, but our therapist says he's not a part of the same system...whatever that means.  He says he will go away with medication, where we won't.  Whatever!??!  Anyhow, Yvette was trying to drive and almost killed us, and Jackson, who is usually in the business of trying to kill us was actually trying to save us by teaching Yvette how to drive.  He told her what Red lights meant and what green lights meant...he told her when it was  a green light and a red light---she was an abused little girl, so she was never taught colors and stuff.  Some how, those two made it home.  And stupid me, got angry at Yvette and told our thearpist the story and he told my doc and they took my fucking license away. SHIT!  that's ridiculous!  We can drive just fine, and if Yvette comes, at least Jackson will help, right?

Anyhow, i don't know why i'm tellin' you all this. i just wanted you to know a little bit about me and some of the others i hang with in my posse (spellin'?) 

Stay cool....i'm sure someone will be on to say hi later...we like this site, you all seem really nice.  we've read some of your all's post and can relate to a lot of what you all say.  

Jakie

Comments

Introduction

[susanacts.livejournal.com]

Hi Jakie!

I'm Suz. I'm the body that The Posse lives in. The body is a mansion, with 17 rooms, one room for each member of The Posse. They are sometimes called alcoves too, which is cool. The Posse has been with me since age 4. All of their memories of that time and years down the road are still quite raw. We are older now, some of us, and we still remember what life was like as a little one. Scary sometimes, but we do the best we can.

We are about to see another therapist. We've been in therapy since age 12, so this is just another coin in the bucket. We've also been seeing psychiatrists since 2002. Such is life when you are a multiple. LOL.

Nice to meet you! I found this group on a website about multiples, and keep a regular journal here too. Feel free to add me as a friend. The more people me n' The Posse meet, the better our quality of life. Cheers!

[nancy-nensi.livejournal.com]

Nice to meet you, Jakie.

Hey, maby you've already tried this, but I've got an idea. Could you get pictures of the people who expect all of you to know their names, label the pictures with the names (or pertinent information, like "my father"), put it all in a picture frame, and hang it on your bedroom wall? Then anyone who hasn't seen the faces would have a cheat sheet to help them know who's who.

Anyway, welcome to the community.

-Nancy

[tej-agni.livejournal.com]

heya I'm LeAnne and I'm part of The Clique which is a group of us teen girls and that's part of the Kasiyan Group which includes everyone! lol :p I don't use eljay that much anymore except to say hey in this community. eljay doesn't hold as many icons and all my icons are somewhere else lol oh well see ya
LeAnne ♥

[krystale.livejournal.com]

We hate not being called by our names, but we don't hold it against people. Well... Eppi does a little, but you'd have to be a total idiot not to be able to recognise Eppi. As for the adults in our system we have trouble telling ourselves appart sometimes, because we run together so much. We try not to hold it against people though, we find that we have such a hard time remembering people, and they all have different bodies and outward differences, that we can't really blame people for having a hard time with us. We do look identical and sound similarly. It's fustrating, but we're determined to give people the patience and acceptance they don't give us. Teach by showing sort of thing.

Y'fandes Mae (and Paige)

[sethrenn.livejournal.com]

He says he will go away with medication, where we won't. Whatever!??!

Oi... apparently there are a lot of therapists out there now who seem to think this? If what we've heard from friends is any indication. Medication doesn't make others in the system go away, it can just appear to have done so because it can break down system communication (we've had some experiences with this, and also known friends who have) so one person gets stuck out front and can't talk to the others. Then the doctors goes "Oh look, the other personalities are gone! That means you're getting better!" *eyeroll*

Don't get me wrong, if a system wants to take something for reasons other than to try to force integration, we're pro-choice about that. But... nooo, it just doesn't work the way your therapist thinks.

~Yushyu

[shade-durza.livejournal.com]

Hiya Jakie, I know how damn annoying it is when you're not able to use your own name. It really bites. That therapist sounds like a jerk to me, meds never kept me away!

Jack

driving for kids

[zamisista.livejournal.com]

hey jakie
thanks for your story, we could all relate to so much of what you said. this is the little ones. we like driving too! at first our Big One didn't realize we were driving. we would just get somewhere and she was surprised we got there already. anyway we learned to drive by sitting up behnd the eyes with her when she was driving, and then we got good at it and now we do most of the driving. we were 6 and 7, now we grew up and we are 14 and 15. cool huh. we told our therapist but she said it is OK and calls us the amazing driving children.
we have a friend who never wants to acknowledge who we are, always just calls us by the system name and we don't come out with her. but our girlfriend loves us all and she makes sure to talk to everyone in the system -big ones, little ones and little J. it helps our communication too because we get to hear what is bugging someone else in the system.
anyway welcome to our community. people here are good and it is safe for little ones.
the little ones, J system