(no subject)

[stealthdragon.livejournal.com]

We're in the slow process of merging our online identity which is known to be plural, with the one that isn't. The first step was last year, when we came out to the inner circle of friends. That part was fairly well-recieved. Now, we're thinking about moving the knowledge boundary out to our not-so-close friends, and the general online population. It's an easier decision, in many ways, because we maintain separation between our online and offline lives. The question is how to do so. What suggestions do you have for coming out to people when you don't have a good idea of how they'll respond?

Comments

[tej-agni.livejournal.com]

Do it in small steps. Especially if you're unsure of the responses and reactions. Be prepared for all different sorts of reactions, even some you didn't expect. Some may be very accepting and others may not be so accepting. I don't want to say "expect the worst", but do be prepared. Especially if it's a sensitive area for anyone in your group to be told "I don't believe you're real".

If people see that you are genuinely wishing to reveal personal areas of your lives with them, and understand how important it is that you share this they may be more accepting. This is who you are. This is the very core of your being you want them to be a part of. Let them know how much your friends mean to your group and how much this sharing means for you. It isn't a small thing to share in this way. Share, be honest, but don't make "a big deal" out of it at the same time. If they don't want to understand, that is their right.

I apologize if I became too preachy here. This is a sensitive area for many in our group and I may have put that into my words here.

Kasia

[stealthdragon.livejournal.com]

Small steps? I don't see how it breaks down. People either have information, or they don't.

I do plan to point out that we're not going to turn into the All Multiple Channel, or anything of that nature. We've still got lives to live, after all.

[tej-agni.livejournal.com]

By testing the waters first is what I meant. *g* I do hope it works out well for you. I'm happy I could help.

Kasia

[schadendox.livejournal.com]

Not all responses are 100% accurate of what someone feels. I've known about this for a while and I'm still sure I'd make an ass of myself if I met a plural group in person. (Does that make any sense?)

Maybe pointing out the blatant stupidity of MPD Hollywood movies will help.

[eridanusus.livejournal.com]

I'm going to come out to three or four of my roleplaying friends soon (online roleplay) and I'm planning to mention Heroes too. Like, Niki/Jessica Sanders is NOT a good example!

[stealthdragon.livejournal.com]

Hah, good point. We'll remember to remind people that hollywood != life.

[eridanusus.livejournal.com]

Also, I'm going to do it in an email, and say it's so they can read over the links and have time to grok it before they have to react to me. First reactions don't always stick, y'nno?

[stealthdragon.livejournal.com]

Hmm, yes. We're planning to make an LJ post about it. Anyone who should know, reads that already.

[ex-memepr0g.livejournal.com]

Good luck doing that - I'd do what tej_agni^Kasia said and do it step-by-step so that you've got a better idea of judging reactions. We're at a point in our outness where it's kind of mixed. There are people who know us only offline who know about us, and some who know us only online who don't. *shrugs* I just do it on a person-to-person basis.

Luke of Fen Group