Single, anyone?

[linnai.livejournal.com]

Hey! Had a question...

So my friend and I were talking about this a bit and he and I both sort of have the same type of problem. Both bodies are in committed relationships, first off. Second off, we're not the ones in the relationships and we're not interested in the significant others in question.

We were wondering if there are others that are in the same boat - but read further since I kinda know there are others in the same boat - and if those others would be interested in a sort of... singles support group? Not like a dating service... but as Kyle said: "A place to post and vent, or rant about crushes or just. You know, be not alone with being single? So no one goes negative. Just, is all right."

Nao of the elses

Comments

[catskillmarina.livejournal.com]

We are in a relationship with another tribe but we also have a relationship with
a singlet who really is mainly interested in one of us romantically.

Polyamory is a good solution as long as you are honest and open with all the parties
involved.

--- Miri

[linnai.livejournal.com]

Got that covered, sort of. We're in a relationship with the Agents, another multiple system that really helped us through our coming out and getting in touch with ourselves, and we're in a relationship with J, a singlet as well.

The problem isn't the existence of relationships. Really... I really like J. He just doesn't understand that I am not interested in certain stuff.

And for Kyle? Well, his problems is being a gay guy in a lesbian dominant body. Not everyone in our system is involved with everyone in the Agent's system and only one of us is involved with J.

Thanks though. Poly was great for Skye. She wanted the committed male and she got it because the Agents are understanding.

[mirrorbrothers.livejournal.com]

He just doesn't understand that I am not interested in certain stuff.

Oh, yeah. Been there. When Rob told his (now ex) boyfriend about me, the guy asked, with some evidence of excitement, whether I ever looked in on them in bed. *shudder* Do you know any other straight guy who would want to watch his brother have sex with a man?

I went past "not interested in" into the zone of "not approving of" on that one. There's guys I would be thrilled for Rob to date, but none of them were that guy. It wasn't that he was that bad, it was just obviously not going to work. (Of course, just as I was beginning to change my mind, they broke up. *rolls eyes*)

I'm not sure I'd ever want a girlfriend, really. But being single while Rob was dating was certainly, um, interesting.

Johnny

[linnai.livejournal.com]

I don't want a boyfriend in the sense of sex and stuff... but I wouldn't mind a bodyfriend in the sense of "shares the same interests, likes to converse with me, possibly even looks forward to talking or whatever"... just more an intimate friend? I don't even want "friends with benefits". I want someone who is a close, trusted best friend sort... and platonic cuddles or such would be welcome, I guess... anything else, honestly, I can take care of on my own.

[jerseytwo.livejournal.com]

I don't think I've ever posted here, but I read a lot.

Anyway, Jeremy and I have been working on some of that stuff. I don't think I'd really mind him having a boyfriend, but there would definitely be a lot of not-watching going on. Before we figured ourselves out, he was already taking the lead on romantic stuff, and I just got weirded out and uncomfortable with anything physical. Thankfully, now I know how to not be cofronting all the time, so I can go and let him do whatever. Cause yeah. *shudder*

Jes

[linnai.livejournal.com]

We thought so. Being lonely is no good... and sometimes even with a large number of companions in-house, it's hard to not feel alone.

[jsystem.livejournal.com]

Umm, we have a significant other that really only one person in the system is interested in. He's a singleton but he knows about us.

A few of us have inter-system relationships, so we could really give a shite less about the whole situation.

It's kinda weird and complicated....... O-o

[shadowechoes.livejournal.com]

Could be interesting. There are some in here who will never have any sort of relationship besides friendship with our husband.

[linnai.livejournal.com]

Same with us. We actually have two physical SOs and still... neither of them (or any of the one, since they're multiple) are interesting to me or are interested in me. *shrugs*

[arcis.livejournal.com]

there are some in-system relationships, and we decided not to let outside relationships bother anyone other than the fronter ^^;

some are single, and don't necessarily want anyone.. some are single and couldn't care less.. *cough*

there's a community for multiple/sb system member personal ads, though, if you're interested ^^;

[fraginfairy.livejournal.com]

Oooh,. if they're not interested, i am. =D Some guys n my host's system r lookin 4 hook ups~ <3 Care 2 share?

~Frag

[liliana-warsaw.livejournal.com]

spiritpersonals

[linnai.livejournal.com]

Were you actually looking to pick someone up or just expressing an interest in finding partners in general? We think sometimes, in some cases, long distance relationships work best... since some of us are lonely but also not comfy in the body :(

[tej-agni.livejournal.com]

All the romantic/dating type relationships within our group are all with others within our own group, or with visitors who've come to our realm. It's fine for those that remain in our realm most or all of the time, but for others of us who use the body alot....it isn't always fine.

A support group in general about relationships is something we've always wanted. The teen_hub is a little bit like that for the younger members, but it's not specific to just that. We'd start another community, but we already run so many.

Butterfly, Amalah

[linnai.livejournal.com]

I think... if you might agree to help co-maintain, that we might be interested in starting one ourselves? We're not good at moderation, but we'd be really happy to start a place. And yes, the idea is more a relationship support vessel than a "finding a mate" sort of scenario. We're looking to support people who are lonely and either DON'T or can't have a mate for whatever reason.

[tej-agni.livejournal.com]

We can do our best :)

[tahaton.livejournal.com]

We think it's a good idea. Most of us have an in system or out of system relationship (except those who aren't interested), but that doesn't stop frustrations from happening. And we know how it is, since we weren't always this way (in relationships)

[arcis.livejournal.com]

.. yes. frustations.
we particularly would like some advice on how to deal with in system ex(-es).. because out-system.. you can just not returning calls, avoid or plainly ignoring the person—
can't do that when you're stuck in the same body. *facepalms*

[fraginfairy.livejournal.com]

=D A singles support grould would b pretty cool. (I mean, I'm c-ing som1 rite now, however, but still.)

And yeah, my host has a girlfriend, but my current boyfriend has another host. She's explained this 2 her girlfriend, but, we don't know exactly how she's taking it. if she's not taking it well, we don't kno. =|

i think that as long as ur honest 2 all in the relationships, things hav a pretty good chance of working out :D

~Frag

[linnai.livejournal.com]

Mostly the idea is networking and support group type affairs.

[redrainstorm.livejournal.com]

Well... Our relationship situation is kind of complicated... I (the 'host') am female, and our partner is female (singlet). We all (partner included) came to an agreement that only myself, CJ, Nishoma, and Damien, can be in a relationship with the current partner. Our partner didn't want random people coming out getting intimate with her if she didn't know them on that level (like she does CJ, Nish, etc).

I have no idea if that made any sense to anyone but us, but yeah!

There are 2 or 3 relationships inner-system wise.

As for others who share the body to come out and have an "outter" relationship with someone other then the current partner... It's sort of been forbidden (for now).

[bladespark.livejournal.com]

I like this idea! I'm a voice within a partially integrated system (if you think of the way some people say they're sometimes "mushy" or "blendy" we're blendy almost all the time,) and most of the others really like our core's boyfriend, but I'm male, and straight! I'm happy that the core is happy, and that the females and bi guys in there are happy too, but I'm feeling kinda left out. I'm the only one not involved with the boyfriend, and yet given that it's just me, and everybody else likes guys, I don't think we could manage to have a girlfriend. Not a serious one anyhow.

I would love to have a support group. If you start one, let me know.