responsibility for others

[emploding.livejournal.com]

i dunno what im trying to say heer but i need to get it out...so bear with me.
one of my alters, Alex, has been around a lot lately. her role in our system is to deal with the mother and she holds a lot of anger and agression.
The mother hasnt been around lately coz she has a boyfriend so shes been staying at his place and we havent really seen her for weeks. Alex seems to be lost coz she doesnt really have anything to do...so shes taken to protecting us in other ways...
but Alex can be harsh. she says what she wants and it sometimes isnt very nice...usually peoples dislike her because of that and she is seen as a 'bitch'; both inside and out.
she has been online a bit lately and has been writing to my groups. she wrote to the self-injury group we are in and told them, not very nicely, about peoples posting pics of their cuts and i wont go into it but it wasnt said very nicely and was actually quite degrading to some peoples.
on that list they dont know im mulitple...so now if i write and try to explain myself...they will say im using that as an excuse and i should take responsibilty for what my others do and stuffs like that.

i know i have to take responsibility for what they do...because they are a part of me...but im not co-concious with Alex usually and have no control over what she says or does.
what do others think about that? i mean about being responsibile for what their alters do?
i know i made no sense and im sorry. but i ramble a lot and needed to get that out and find out what others think.
thanks heaps

-Em Ella & Co

Comments

Hard to say...

[jrasku.livejournal.com]

I personaly think that being out about this sort of thing is a good idea generally speaking. The problem hear is, whether or not this will be taken as a cop out, or real, or whatever. One thing that you can do is simply say ``sorry I did that''. But that doesn't really explain the situation and why it might happen. You can also say ``Alex is one of my alters, and this is how she deals with the world'', but being cautious about such things, being aware that some people out there will take it as a ``I'm not really responsible, it was my alter that did it''.

My way, and I've not exactly experience that, would be to say ``I'm sorry, I know I've not mentioned this before, but I have littles who sometimes show up and sometimes do things which I can't agree with. If you want to talk about that, I'm willing to, I've just not brought it up before''. That is what I *think* that I'd say. The thing is, I'm co-concious (as far as I know) with all of my alters. So, if something is done by another alter, I have to think seriously about the fact that I *could* have stopped that. And, also, try to figure out if it was *me* or if it was an alter.

Just some thoughts...