(no subject)

[linnai.livejournal.com]

Anyone have any creative ideas for how to deal with the problem of clothing while in a work environment? Any tips or suggestions? Methods you've used... anything?

Comments

[pthalo]

What kind of problem of clothing?

[linnai.livejournal.com]

Someone getting dressed before coming to work, and then someone more suited to the working environment of the evening doing the actual work.

I'm currently dressed in some sort of deathmetal band shirt in black, green and white with a skull on it, a pair of shiny (and very LOUD) huge purple pants and an assortment of odd jewelry (which isn't bad, really).

I've heard that others have similar sorts of problems regarding comfortable clothing tastes. I'm just wondering if I can gleen any pointers from more knowledgeable sources.

Els

[pthalo]

Oh, I'd probably make a system rule then that if the body needs to be at work, they need to change into work appropriate clothing before work (specify what that is), have the hair brushed and presentable and all that.

[linnai.livejournal.com]

Thankfully, the clothing IS work-appropriate, as we work - through mutual agreement - the graveyard shift at a technical support center.

We're presentable but it's still becoming an issue. We have a multitude of different clothes to wear, most of which we're all comfortable in. It's just some of us.

[pthalo]

*nod* yeah that's understandable. I'd still suggest talking it over with them, suggesting that they should dress in clothing that everybody is comfortable in (or both people involved), if they know someone else is going to need to be in the body (for example, at work).

I know I'd be uncomfortable in bright purple pants.

[linnai.livejournal.com]

I know I'd be uncomfortable in bright purple pants.

I'm sorry, that made me giggle. It's exactly how I feel, only perhaps a little more strange, as I'm sitting here at work for close to 6 and a half hours now with these bright purple ripstop nylon pants on!

Thank you for the suggestions. I'll talk it over with everyone to see what agreements we can come to.

Though, I'm still open to suggestions, because I know that everyone wants to feel comfortable when they're utilizing our outside resources.

[idianshire.livejournal.com]

Ok so I am not sure what the issue is then, it isn't effecting your job, you aren't risking getting fired over dressing inappropriately. Is it just that you don't like the clothing. For us, when we were working, clothing became a way to be free to express ourselves (with in the bounds of appropriateness, ie, no slutty wear to our job in the bank). Sometimes compromise isn't about one person getting everything there way and "unusual" clothing isn't a bad thing to lose on

[linnai.livejournal.com]

It ISN'T about not compromising or not letting people express themselves. It's about people who express themselves and don't stop to think about how that is going to inconvenience or bother someone else.

[kangetsuhime.livejournal.com]

If people are getting that upset over wearing clothes that they wouldn't usually, then I think clothing's not the issue you need to be looking at lady.

[linnai.livejournal.com]

We all appreciate being able to express ourselves, and we also enjoy allowing the others we share space with to express themselves in a manner they appreciate. The issue is more in the direction of the fact that we have certain members who have image issues, who are main forward, driving bodies while we were at work and they were having a slightly difficult time with the fact that we were wearing something that to them was in appropriate and wrong when they had to be present to represent the best possible ability to satisfy our work environment.

So, yes, it was an issue other than the clothes that was the precipitator. I'm sorry for the defensiveness. We've spoken about it some and will address the issue some more. But our System has only just evolved into something organized and mostly cooperative, and we still have some problems we're trying to work out and some of us also want to reach out to this community.

[pengke.livejournal.com]

People have every right to get upset when they're stuck wearing clothes that they hate or make them feel uncomfortable. There's nothing abnormal about it so don't worry about commentors saying you have issues.

[linnai.livejournal.com]

Thanks for going easy on us. Appreciate it.

[ksol1460.livejournal.com]

What pengke said. See our earlier response (the one after elenbarathi's). Of course it is not "just" the clothing, we live in a culture where clothing says volumes about your image and who you are.

[pengke.livejournal.com]

You could make a list of the clothes that bother certain people and have a rule that they can't be worn to work. The problem clothes can be worn after work or on your days off when people have the option of either changing outfits or not fronting.

[kasiya-system.livejournal.com]

Well, if that's what your work environment allows, then go for it. It's not about what everyone's taste is at work, it's about what the dresscode is for where you work. If you guys want to get in trouble at work, then by all means, go against your dress code. What's worn outside of work I guess wouldn't be an issue. If they aren't sure what's allowed at work, then have someone else keep out a set of appropriate clothes for them to wear the next day. o.O

[linnai.livejournal.com]

We don't want to get in trouble with our Human Resources department. Our job isn't the best, but it's very necessary to our independence. When it's worn outside of work, we definitely don't have an issue with whomever likes displaying whatever fashion tastes they're interested in. Right now we're just trying to work out some cooperative guidelines to keep things running.

[shatterstorm.livejournal.com]

What we did was find accessories that do that "just me" thing.

So if person A likes the shiny red/fuschia/silver metallic netting scarf and person B doesn't, B can just stuff it in a pocket when fronting. Jewelry, scarves, hairties, a vest or overshirt, all those things can work this way.

A couple of our more protective adults have taken to adding a piece or two favored by the kids when they're fronting to let the kids know they're welcome to be around.

[garden-keep.livejournal.com]

Mindy's usually our front person, so we usually don't have that problem.

The only time it becomes an issue is when Janessa comes out and goes "Ew! These shoes are soooo ugly!", or Eve starts doing her more-goth-than-thou makeup. Other than that, we have a pretty small selection of clothes that have a base of black pants and red shirts (or various tank tops).

-Chris

[linnai.livejournal.com]

We have an incredibly large selection of clothes for a group of people who largely don't put a lot of stock into attire. We have everything from the "gothic" stereo typical clothes and makeup, through a sort of cyber-gothic rave attire, into the colorful, mismatched, ecclectic candy(?) raver and all the way up through one or two business suits with a black blazer that is a normal wear item!

I prefer my tank tops, a sweater and a pair of jeans, honestly... but I'm pretty uncomfortable currently.

[eridanusus.livejournal.com]

We don't often wear skirts anymore. It's one of the disadvantages of have so many male fronters, I suppose. :( We've just had to learn to find something mutually acceptable. Usually plain pants and a button down shirt.

[linnai.livejournal.com]

Your icon is very pretty.

We don't have too many shirts, thinking of our wardrobe. Though I think some of us would prefer a few more girly touches. We do have a variety of pants so big they seem to be dresses... but that's it.

I think it's good for everyone to have something they like to wear, just because that's a nice creature comfort.

[eridanusus.livejournal.com]

Thank you :)

We have quite a few baggy pants as well, mostly Dat's. Also some girly summer tops, from when our main front was female, and some that the others of us have bought every so often. Most of our wardrobe is fairly androgynous though.

[linnai.livejournal.com]

I'm pretty sure out wardrobe is very female, if not particularly feminine. Boot cut pants, and a lot of spaghetti strap tank tops (which I love). We do have a few men's dress shirts for no other reason than "They're comfortable".

It depends on who is out in the evening before work what we wear, but usually it's jeans.

Androgynous dress is nice, though.

[szczur-system.livejournal.com]

I don't know, I hear that Dat likes to wear bikini's... ;-)

[eridanusus.livejournal.com]

was chris *sulk*

[szczur-system.livejournal.com]

Hahahahaha :)

[nomads-quill.livejournal.com]

I sort of adopted what my mom calls "a uniform." Generally, we all decided what we could tolerate and went from there. This way I always look appropriate and -the larger issue- no one ever switches into some type of clothing that freaks them out.

I've dont this since waking up. Ages, now. Mostly, it works. Season changes, though, send my system reeling for days.

[kangetsuhime.livejournal.com]

We for the most part wear things that don't freak each other out. But if someone wears something that the other system members don't like, our way of thinking is very simple.

Stop whining and deal with it, or don't f'ing front.

It's *clothes* we're talking about here. It's not the end of the world. I've gotten to the stage where I don't even blink if Lu sticks her Underworld top on.

[bloodypetals.livejournal.com]

So glad our work has a uniform..

[kasiya-system.livejournal.com]

Problems of clothing in a work environment? Uh, wear some? o.O

[kangetsuhime.livejournal.com]

Lol, I totally thought that when I first read this! "Like, what, you wanna go nekkid? Dude, I really don't recommend that in work o.O"

[laurenthemself]

To be honest, that's what I thought as well.

Uh heheheheheh

[spookshow-girl.livejournal.com]

Is this, like, a nudist multiple community? Damn guys, why didn't anyone tell me?

--Me

Re: Uh heheheheheh

[ksol1460.livejournal.com]

XD LOAO!

Re: Uh heheheheheh

[shatterstorm.livejournal.com]

*streaks by laughing*

[zenboiuke.livejournal.com]

lol yeah, we have challenges as well, considering the different people, both men & women, who share this body. What we did was set down some house rules, such as I get almost exclusive control while I'm at work. But the others are aware that if for some reason I was MIA (which I never am. I wish I knew how to be XD) they would need to dress appropriately for a corporate environment.

When we're at home or going out for fun, sometimes one of the others will dress us up. It can still be a bit awkward when one of the girls picks out our clothes. The outfit Grace wore a few months ago would have had us setting off fire alarms ~_~;;; Thank the gods she couldn't get her hands on platform shoes XD

If everyone is aware of when & how you guys will need to dress 'appropriately', you should be fine, as long as y'all respect one another & understand that whatever one person does (or wears :p) will likely affect the entire system.

Good luck!
~Kier

[elenbarathi.livejournal.com]

We have a number of "clothing issues" - not about work, because nobody at either of my jobs would care, but just because we've got different tastes and requirements.

Crist-Erui has major tactile sensitivity issues, and no compunction at all about 'flickering' up to take off anything he finds uncomfortable. It would take me no time at all to get dressed, but that just about every morning, I have to engage in this whole compromise-process with my brother. No synthetic fabrics, nothing that squeezes or pinches or scratches or slips or rides up - he's incredibly picky, and will sometimes get stubborn about it even if I'm dressing to go somewhere he certainly won't be taking form, like traffic court. He likes silk, and so I buy silk button-down shirts at the thrift stores whenever I see them - they're cheap enough that it doesn't matter when he quickly wears them out.

Kír won't take form if what we're wearing is too girly - he says it doesn't matter because he has no need to take form, but I don't agree with that, and don't want to give him such an easy excuse. The black suede pants and jacket are *his* - Crist-Erui would trash them, and I don't think I look that good in them - but he seldom wears them, and says that jeans or sweat-pants are fine.

Mostly that's what we wear: jeans or cotton sweat-pants, silk, cotton or rayon shirts or sweaters, and boots or sneakers. Dark cool colors - black, grey, dark or sage green, dark or muted blues - that way, everything matches just about everything else. This climate (western WA) has unpredictable weather - I mean really unpredictable; tank-top to heavy parka on any day of the year - so it's essential to dress in layers.

I'd suggest for your House, that you negotiate a working arrangement - like, the person who's most responsible for your job gets to say what is acceptable work attire - and also that you pack a small bag with a "default outfit", something comfortable, practical and unobtrusive that anyone can change into if he or she takes form and can't stand what the body's wearing. Good luck!

[ksol1460.livejournal.com]

Our clothing issues were not so much about style or appropriateness as about gender issues: see our prior comment here:
http://www.livejournal.com/community/multiplicity/179063.html?thread=1821559#t1821559

You talk about "how to die of embarrassment".

We still cannot control who is up -- when we try, we get The Headache. If we had frilly girlie frontrunners today, we would find some kind of compromise in the nature of elenbarathi's "default outfit" which is very much like what we ended up doing when we worked outside the home back in the 80s.

[echthros.livejournal.com]

We wear jeans and tshirts, or jeans and sweatshirts, depending on the weather. We don't own anything that's terrifically out there, though some of the shirts are more offensive than others.

[ex-khailitha846.livejournal.com]

For what it's worth, there have been times when We've been Very Late to places because We were sitting in front of the closet arguing about clothes.

Without a doubt, the person who is going to end up actually wearing the clothes should get to choose. But it gets tricky when plans are such that several people may be out, either singularly or together.

Unfortunately, what this usually means is a toned-down, "uniform" version of whatever style is under discussion, much to the dismay of the more flamboyant girls in here.

Another tactic that We have used, with some success, is to set aside regularly scheduled events or outings for specific people where they can dress however they like. I have found that when they know "their time is coming" they are less likely to send me to a parent-teacher conference in a mini-skirt and thigh-high leather boots.

*sigh* But, we still, sometimes, debate the clothing issue with some rancor. Although, I'm thinking that is probably progress from the most unpleasant experience of coming-to in someone else's clothes. *flashes a commiserating grin* It's been a while since that has happened.

[linnai.livejournal.com]

Mmm. I remember this happening a lot when we were in school. Middle school, more than any other. Remember getting dressed, and it not being acceptable for someone else, so we would get redressed (rinse, wash, repeat), and then be late for school and end up getting yelled at. The parents thought it was a ploy to avoid going to school...

[shandra.livejournal.com]

Clothes!

We've found the following helps to cut down the arguments for us.

We have days where people can wear their own clothes, usually not work days - this ensures that people get *some* time to express themselves. So like one day a week on a rotating basis is "go wild" day for whoever. And everyone gets to buy a go wild outfit. Also these outfits are for when those people are doing their own thing, like if Lynn wants to wear slutty t-shirts and bad jewelry for her poetry readings, fine.

For the rest of the time we have clothes that pretty much people generally are okay with. This involves a lot of time shopping sometimes - like someone will say "that's a nice top" and then we have to take the time to get different people to the store to look at it to see if *they* like it. If enough people do, we tend to buy it, because that's a rare thing. However enough of us enjoy browing through stores at lunchtime or whatever that it's not a huge deal.

That stable of "reasonably okay for everyone clothes" is what people pick for work days. It's a little more casual than some of us would choose, etc. etc. - they're compromises, not dream outfits. They lean a bit off sometimes towards the black/gothic spectrum because more people are willing to put up with that.

(And in the end this has saved us a lot of money and closet space, since there's some agreement and the things we buy actually are worn. :))

We also use accessories to fine-tune the self expression based on the sort of more neutral-y general clothes - they can be taken off midday or changed around more easily.

Then we have a couple of outfits designed more for important meetings and stuff where it's a very specific image we want to present and people are good about just letting that happen.

[sethrenn.livejournal.com]

The small size of our wardrobe and general financial situation keeps too many arguments from happening over what to wear. We do often hear complaints from certain unnamable individuals about their discontent with that situation, but I think that's another issue, heh.

Generally, we tend to go for things like jeans, T-shirts and sweaters most of the time. A few people have mentioned sensory issues, and people in here definitely have those. One of the reasons for all the jeans is that many people in here tend to prefer fabrics that are slightly heavy and rough-- soft fabrics feel too 'slippery.' Actually, the issue of skirts is one that's been problematic a few times, because there are a few people who love them, a few who are indifferent, and a few who can't stand the sensation of what they describe as 'having their legs hanging out.'

Azu and Shiu are mostly inclined to jeans and t-shirts-- Azu is one of the ones who has the most sensory issues about soft/loose fabrics, so that's mostly her wardrobe. Shiu actually likes to wear skirts and dresses every once in a while (he believes in purposely messing around with ideas of what's appropriate for each gender, even though it's not quite as effective as it could be because nobody thinks twice about a female body wearing a skirt). Anthea likes flowing sorts of things-- skirts, dresses, a lot of Greek-looking stuff. Ruka is inclined to wearing very expensive things which he will only with unanimous consensus be allowed to buy-- he'll settle for the body wearing almost anything which isn't too feminine-looking, but he doesn't have to like it.