Thank You

[gia1977.livejournal.com]

Hi Adriana and El. Thank you! Still Victoria here, but Gia can see a bit. I still have her somewhat pressed down. I've let her out here and there to test how she's doing. We can say yesterday was answers day. We did take elavil last night, to knock us out to rest this poor body. The only things we hate about Elavil is how it's so drowsy and draining. So, we're all a bit subdued.

Yesterday was a bad day for all. Our dad came to get us to run around, despite we're getting over a touch of the flu. We did go grocery shopping. We did manage to tell "dad" that we thought "mother" ignores us and he replied she ignores everyone. Fair Enough. We told DAD that sister was hateful and dad said, sometimes. WTF? We didn't tell dad he was nuts. Now what we really wanted to say and need to say was Jesse style, you all are driving us crazy. Dad you are fucking nuts. Mom is fucking crazy. And sister is fucking full of bull shit! Instead we said it nicely!

We talked with our friend who is a medium psychic, not sure how people feel about it, but we talked with her about how things are going and a wall was finally broken. I'll let Gia out for this moment.

Hi. I learned why I'm afraid of heights and why I refuses to learn to swim or go near water without a life jacket. I've no problems going and wading in water about waist down, but anything else and there is war! Thru the psychic, grandma came thru. Some may discredit the psychic, but she mentioned the nick name fruity tooty. (My nick name among others.) Grandma (Sweet great woman) told me reminded me that the balconey almost fell and I've always been afraid of heights. Everytime I go near stairs or anything that involve holding onto something near stairs or I can see heights - I've always had an inner instinct to crawl away and hold onto the walls, get far away from the stairs or heights and railings. I don't remember the whole senario, but I know it's a key. Plus, I've also had this vision in the back of my mind of being on grass, but looking down towards the ground below of brown dirt, like a cliff or something. I know something is there and this is just a key. For my fear of water without a life jacket. I am fine on a boat, with life jacket. I'm find wading in water waist down, but otherwise I freak out badly and instinctively. Grandma said that we were at the beach and the tide came in early and broke up something you had made like a castle or something. Grandma said I was crying " I will not build again. Then later goes on to say, "water in your ears. Feeling of choking and a cut on the knee." I did laugh as I vividly remember that episode. See, my little girl of personality (there are two littles, that I'm aware of) is safe on the beach building sand castles. She's with pigtails and no glasses or hearing aid. Dressed in blue tank top with yellow shorts having a ball on the beach playing.

Victoria here. Sorry, she was spacing out. I told her to go play with little girl. As you can see, we've hit a good point. The only thing though, is this body has had many types of experiences of water or near water. So, it's hard to pinpoint ages, but we'll work slowly on those memories. Of course, if they were traumatic, forget it! I must admit, after Gia had that experience with the psychic, the neck cracked and we felt better. Neck had been so stiff. I'm blank right now. Will journal later. Tired!

(no subject)

[walkerinthegrey.livejournal.com]

So I made a mistake. I was using the body, and Ace's boyfriend was talking to me online. He was talking about past lives, and things, and telling me quite a bit more than he'd told her, so I encouraged him. However, I felt a little guilty, so I stopped just dropping subtle hints and flat-out told him that I wasn't the one he thought I was.
You see, she'd already explained to him about our multiplicity.
But then, the unexpected:
He refused to believe that I was not her, no matter what I said.
I thought he could accept it. I thought he would understand. Hell, so did Ace.
Instead, I'm within an inch of driving over there and shooting him. (Well. I was. I'm a little calmer.) It's just very, very, very frustrating.
What do I do? There's no way I'm going to sit around and stick my thumbs up my ass and deny my own existance.
Hell no.
(Oh. Like my Yule icon? Innit nifty?)