As the person who wrote the post said, he doesn't know the one who did this very well at all.
For me at least:
a) I work on a need to know basis. The one who holds the memories may not think the partner needs to know because it might cause more trouble and problems than it's worth.
b) The one who holds the memories may not be willing to hurt the partner's feelings by admitting that she needed and/or wanted and/or chose to have this done.
c) The one who holds the memories may not be willing to cast the character of the one whose memories were purged in a negative light and might be taking the blame themself.
d) The one whose memories were purged might be in such a fragile state (which the partner seemed to indicate in their post) that it needs to NOT be discussed in order to not cause further damage/distress.
There are many, many scenarios when those outside a system are not privileged with all of the information a system has, particularly if a front/protector feels that such information would do more harm than good.
At least in my experience. Mandala, front for Gira&
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timeasmymeasure
Re: I dissagree with you.
Date: 2004-10-19 03:27 pm (UTC)For me at least:
a) I work on a need to know basis. The one who holds the memories may not think the partner needs to know because it might cause more trouble and problems than it's worth.
b) The one who holds the memories may not be willing to hurt the partner's feelings by admitting that she needed and/or wanted and/or chose to have this done.
c) The one who holds the memories may not be willing to cast the character of the one whose memories were purged in a negative light and might be taking the blame themself.
d) The one whose memories were purged might be in such a fragile state (which the partner seemed to indicate in their post) that it needs to NOT be discussed in order to not cause further damage/distress.
There are many, many scenarios when those outside a system are not privileged with all of the information a system has, particularly if a front/protector feels that such information would do more harm than good.
At least in my experience.
Mandala, front for Gira&