Maybe an idea is to not try to make her see what she's doing is wrong. Because if she is ill then she is probably not going to be able to understand what you mean, or maybe just not be able to care about it. It's like telling a depressed person they are wrong for crying? But if you tell them that crying is normal for them then maybe you can get her to be more trusting and care more over time about returning the kindness and trying not to put the body in bad situations.
Long ago I might have wanted Sade gone sometimes. And sometimes her problems affect us all. Like you say though. Without her it would not feel right.
People who are ill are hard to know what to do with, we know. All you can really do is try to support them and understand why they do what they do. And hope that eventually they get better or at least try. If she shrugs it off then don't mind. Just stay there so that when she needs/wants you, you are there. People who are ill are probably used to people who give up on them. If you don't, you are a constant. That has value beyond anything, even if she never thanks you properly.
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timeasmymeasure
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Date: 2006-12-15 05:12 pm (UTC)Long ago I might have wanted Sade gone sometimes. And sometimes her problems affect us all. Like you say though. Without her it would not feel right.
People who are ill are hard to know what to do with, we know. All you can really do is try to support them and understand why they do what they do. And hope that eventually they get better or at least try. If she shrugs it off then don't mind. Just stay there so that when she needs/wants you, you are there. People who are ill are probably used to people who give up on them. If you don't, you are a constant. That has value beyond anything, even if she never thanks you properly.