My gf's system self-integrated. its hard for us to say what good it did her. their story is they 'wanted to act and think in one voice' I don't really know what their people think since I haven't spoken to any of them since. Their new person seems alot of things to me. some good, some bad. Shes alot more stable now. none of their old system-wide 'issues' seem really solved to me. ie, struggles that they pretty much all had. We don't communicate with the new person much. Were willing to bet that she 'leaks' often. we see the traits of some of her more distinctive folk often enough, though none have fessed up to fronting yet.
I really can't make up my mind if i think it was a good idea or not. they had alot of internal conflict and not so much faith that they'd work it out. I miss these people and seeing her reminds me of them. Im skeptical that this will get them the happiness they want, especially if their specific whatevers go unaddressed.
On the other hand, the conflict appears to have ended. I wouldn't accuse the new one of being happy, nor happier, but she is clearly at peace. she's held the front for over six months now.
I don't care to share her details specifically, but we wonder if it was the better choice for them. she might be able to take this and do well. we're a little happier since we have reason to believe that they have the ability to undo it if they decided to. I've accepted that its her and their decision and that they've made it.
my system has memories of being soley conscious, but we cannot imagine how being glued back together would be desirable to us. given a number of the issues we used to have which no longer exist as a result of learning how to front (repressed rage, depression, freakishly darkened eye-bags, psychotic impulses, other subtle stuff). we believe that learning how to front, stay a part of life in some way, keep everyone feeling fulfilled, etc. is our road. we have resources tho, internal and external. and alot of us have an intense desire to survive and be ourselves.
I don't know, im very ignorant of integration. but with the very shallow understanding I have right now, i would recommend it as an option worth considering to systems of two sorts.
1. systems full of members who don't feel they are whole people, but rather all are some form of 'fragment' or something, (as opposed to a system full of solid individuals who would describe themselves as 'whole') AND arent interested in developing into whole people. my personal theory is that for systems of this sort, integration might actually work.
2. systems where peaceful resolution and functionality are beyond comprehension for whatever reason, and would agree that 'anything would be better then this'. my personal theory is that integration works less well the more 'solid' members have become.
I believe that 'the way' is developing each into functionality/wholeness/happiness/whateverness.
I don't believe that everyone is capable of it on their own, nor do i think that resources exist on an accessible level for such a person to get help.
good luck though, whatever you do.
(maybe we should all form our own island colony, like the lepers did? the unitedly divided states of _____?)
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timeasmymeasure
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Date: 2005-03-17 02:32 am (UTC)its hard for us to say what good it did her.
their story is they 'wanted to act and think in one voice'
I don't really know what their people think since I haven't spoken to any of them since.
Their new person seems alot of things to me. some good, some bad.
Shes alot more stable now. none of their old system-wide 'issues' seem really solved to me. ie, struggles that they pretty much all had.
We don't communicate with the new person much.
Were willing to bet that she 'leaks' often. we see the traits of some of her more distinctive folk often enough, though none have fessed up to fronting yet.
I really can't make up my mind if i think it was a good idea or not. they had alot of internal conflict and not so much faith that they'd work it out.
I miss these people and seeing her reminds me of them. Im skeptical that this will get them the happiness they want, especially if their specific whatevers go unaddressed.
On the other hand, the conflict appears to have ended. I wouldn't accuse the new one of being happy, nor happier, but she is clearly at peace. she's held the front for over six months now.
I don't care to share her details specifically, but we wonder if it was the better choice for them. she might be able to take this and do well. we're a little happier since we have reason to believe that they have the ability to undo it if they decided to. I've accepted that its her and their decision and that they've made it.
my system has memories of being soley conscious, but we cannot imagine how being glued back together would be desirable to us. given a number of the issues we used to have which no longer exist as a result of learning how to front (repressed rage, depression, freakishly darkened eye-bags, psychotic impulses, other subtle stuff). we believe that learning how to front, stay a part of life in some way, keep everyone feeling fulfilled, etc. is our road. we have resources tho, internal and external. and alot of us have an intense desire to survive and be ourselves.
I don't know, im very ignorant of integration. but with the very shallow understanding I have right now, i would recommend it as an option worth considering to systems of two sorts.
1. systems full of members who don't feel they are whole people, but rather all are some form of 'fragment' or something, (as opposed to a system full of solid individuals who would describe themselves as 'whole') AND arent interested in developing into whole people. my personal theory is that for systems of this sort, integration might actually work.
2. systems where peaceful resolution and functionality are beyond comprehension for whatever reason, and would agree that 'anything would be better then this'. my personal theory is that integration works less well the more 'solid' members have become.
I believe that 'the way' is developing each into functionality/wholeness/happiness/whateverness.
I don't believe that everyone is capable of it on their own, nor do i think that resources exist on an accessible level for such a person to get help.
good luck though, whatever you do.
(maybe we should all form our own island colony, like the lepers did? the unitedly divided states of _____?)