Interesting literary find.
Jul. 19th, 2007 01:09 pm![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
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multiplicity_archives(I don't recall seeing this posted before, but I could be wrong.)
We just got back from doing a little book-shopping and stumbled across an MPD/DID book we'd never seen before. Since I'm compelled to read each and every one of these atrocities I find, I looked it over, fully intending to buy it no matter how awful it was... but to my surprise, the first quote I read on the back cover actually THRILLED me. Here it is:
"I've lived this way and managed for all of my life. And I don't view it as dysfunctional, actually. I like the way that I am, and it works."
A collective wave of confusion followed by disbelief and excitement washed over the several of us who were close to the front. A multiple, in her own words, describing her system as functional and alluding to a desire to STAY multiple? We were more than a little interested.
The name of this book is "I Am More Than One: How Women with Dissociative Identity Disorder Have Found Success in Life and Work." It's fairly new and I've only briefly looked it over so far, and of course it's chock full of the usual crap. Obligatory trauma, dissociation, "parts" of one person, etc. But it deviates from most of the books we've read on the subject in a few places, the most notable of which being integration. The book actually states that not only is integration not required and not the best option for every system, but that not integrating can actually be helpful and enable a system to live a more healthy, fulfilled life than they would otherwise.
Included was this list of one system's preconditions which were required before any integration would take place. The language irks us, but the last 2 points are the ones that made us want to stand up and cheer:
"1. The part was able to tell what happened to her or him in the past.
2. The therapist believed the part's memory.
3. The part realized that what happened in the past was no the part's fault.
4. The part wanted to integrate.
5. All other parts of the mind, including the host, agreed to the integration."
As I looked over this chapter I noticed how much emphasis was placed on choice: whether or not a system wanted to integrate, whether or not people in-system wanted to age, even therapy that offered guidance and support instead of coercion towards integration. In an earlier chapter cooperation was discussed. It was explained how some systems held internal meetings and voted in order to make decisions, and how certain people did certain jobs in order to succeed in the workplace or at home.
The best part, for us, was reading quotes from systems about their positive feelings and experiences of being multiple. This is what almost every single book we've ever read about multiplicity has lacked. We were honestly shocked and elated to read some of the quotes. Examples:
(Referring to complete integration) "See, we don't know what that would be like. We don't even know what we'd be like. It's kind of an interesting thought. We tried to figure out what it would be like to have nobody else to visit with, and play with, and talk to, and chat. But we couldn't. We've never been that way."
"The different personalities working together inside [has] probably got a lot to do with how I work with people outside. Because you learn that. My biggest thing is that you want to treat people the way you want to be treated yourself. That's just how I am. But I think a lot of that came with learning how to manage all of us."
"See, what we realized is nobody understands what it's like to be us unless you is us. And for anybody that's not, it doesn't make sense. But for us it doesn't make sense otherwise. And when we try to figure out how it will be [to be integrated], it will be like dropping us into a country [where] we didn't speak the language or understand anything, and have to learn all over. 'Cause we process information different."
So. Even if the rest of the book turns out to be crap, it was worth it for these quotes. I'm really, really hoping this is a sign of things to come. It's still a long way from "some systems aren't created as a response to trauma," but it's definitely a step in the right direction. Have any of you read this book? What did you think of it?
P.S. The word "singleton" is in the glossary and is used throughout the book. Have professionals been using this term all along or is this a recent thing? The only other place I've heard that word is online.
We just got back from doing a little book-shopping and stumbled across an MPD/DID book we'd never seen before. Since I'm compelled to read each and every one of these atrocities I find, I looked it over, fully intending to buy it no matter how awful it was... but to my surprise, the first quote I read on the back cover actually THRILLED me. Here it is:
"I've lived this way and managed for all of my life. And I don't view it as dysfunctional, actually. I like the way that I am, and it works."
A collective wave of confusion followed by disbelief and excitement washed over the several of us who were close to the front. A multiple, in her own words, describing her system as functional and alluding to a desire to STAY multiple? We were more than a little interested.
The name of this book is "I Am More Than One: How Women with Dissociative Identity Disorder Have Found Success in Life and Work." It's fairly new and I've only briefly looked it over so far, and of course it's chock full of the usual crap. Obligatory trauma, dissociation, "parts" of one person, etc. But it deviates from most of the books we've read on the subject in a few places, the most notable of which being integration. The book actually states that not only is integration not required and not the best option for every system, but that not integrating can actually be helpful and enable a system to live a more healthy, fulfilled life than they would otherwise.
Included was this list of one system's preconditions which were required before any integration would take place. The language irks us, but the last 2 points are the ones that made us want to stand up and cheer:
"1. The part was able to tell what happened to her or him in the past.
2. The therapist believed the part's memory.
3. The part realized that what happened in the past was no the part's fault.
4. The part wanted to integrate.
5. All other parts of the mind, including the host, agreed to the integration."
As I looked over this chapter I noticed how much emphasis was placed on choice: whether or not a system wanted to integrate, whether or not people in-system wanted to age, even therapy that offered guidance and support instead of coercion towards integration. In an earlier chapter cooperation was discussed. It was explained how some systems held internal meetings and voted in order to make decisions, and how certain people did certain jobs in order to succeed in the workplace or at home.
The best part, for us, was reading quotes from systems about their positive feelings and experiences of being multiple. This is what almost every single book we've ever read about multiplicity has lacked. We were honestly shocked and elated to read some of the quotes. Examples:
(Referring to complete integration) "See, we don't know what that would be like. We don't even know what we'd be like. It's kind of an interesting thought. We tried to figure out what it would be like to have nobody else to visit with, and play with, and talk to, and chat. But we couldn't. We've never been that way."
"The different personalities working together inside [has] probably got a lot to do with how I work with people outside. Because you learn that. My biggest thing is that you want to treat people the way you want to be treated yourself. That's just how I am. But I think a lot of that came with learning how to manage all of us."
"See, what we realized is nobody understands what it's like to be us unless you is us. And for anybody that's not, it doesn't make sense. But for us it doesn't make sense otherwise. And when we try to figure out how it will be [to be integrated], it will be like dropping us into a country [where] we didn't speak the language or understand anything, and have to learn all over. 'Cause we process information different."
So. Even if the rest of the book turns out to be crap, it was worth it for these quotes. I'm really, really hoping this is a sign of things to come. It's still a long way from "some systems aren't created as a response to trauma," but it's definitely a step in the right direction. Have any of you read this book? What did you think of it?
P.S. The word "singleton" is in the glossary and is used throughout the book. Have professionals been using this term all along or is this a recent thing? The only other place I've heard that word is online.
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